The Winter

Chapter 18

My skin pickled as a wave of power washed over me. My mate's eyes shone brighter than the sun itself in that moment. He nodded to himself, as if he would be able to keep fate at bay, and his fingers curled into my dress as if scared something might try to snatch me away at that very moment.

I cupped his cheek as he so often did mine, thumb sweeping over a scar by his eyebrow only someone who'd studied his face as intently as I had would notice.

"Remember, Freyja did not see my taking you as a mate. She didn't see that I would be able to run across worlds, speak the language of gods, or see and hear the dead. Who knows what else of my life and future remains shrouded or could yet be subject to change due to the choices we haven't made yet?" Leaning in, I kissed him tenderly. His lips were soft and warm against mine, his sweet honey scent invading my senses. He deepened the kiss with a near frantic edge that left me breathless when we parted again."The seed I grew from was plucked from one of the apples of Idunn which keeps the gods young beyond their time, my bones are strengthened by the branches of Yggdrasill which reach into every realm, and water from Mímisbrunnr, the well of knowledge, runs through my veins. . ."

How could anyone possibly say what would become of me when I was all of those butterfly impossible things? They couldn't. I didn't believe anyone could. I believed Freyja saw the future, however, I did not believe she saw one path and one path only. So there was hope. I would have her admit to me there was hope.

"Do you think what you truly are means you will age as I do?" Hati murmured against my lips, dark blond brows still pinched unhappily together.

I pulled back with fake offence, gasping as I flung my hand over my heart.
"Why? Fear how hard it will be to love me if I grow to be a wrinkled Cailleach?"

He chuckled, but the doubt did not disappear as he rested his forehead against mine. "You would still be beautiful to me, Little Alpha. The only thing I truly fear is losing you, and being left to walk the rest of my long years alone. If I am forced to, I would never be able to lay eyes on another, so do not say I could in an effort to ready me for a day you might no longer be here."

How he'd seen that I was about to say another female would cause him to stumble in his tracks eventually, I didn't know, but I found his reassurance exactly what I needed. I breathed him in, his sweet scent filling my nose, the hand still resting in my lap clinging to Hati's so tight, it probably hurt him but he didn't complain. Neither of us were willing to be parted in that moment. Maybe he too feared if he let go now I might blow away into stardust.

"I will always find my way to you," I promised him on a possessive growl.

His own growl rumbled forth, electrifying my skin and making my insides clench as he promised just as vehemently, "Hel will not be able to keep me from you. I may not have your magic but I would still tear through realms to get to you, no matter who stood in my way." Expression creasing in pain, he added, "No more talk of this, though. All we can do is carry on as we have and take each day as it comes."

And pretend each day that passed wasn't an hour glass filled with the sands of my lifespan. In this body at least. If the energy that gave me life always was, then it surely always would be. Maybe my body didn't matter; maybe my power could find another, but I could never take another's as Sköll's demon Blood Drinkers did. And the idea of having to come into the world as I had in this life, of being born again, was unsettling. This body was me, even if in reality I'd only had it for a drop in the ocean compared to how long I'd been in existence.

Why could I not remember anything? Was I even sentient before I was. . .born?

"Is something wrong, my mate?"