The Offering

Chapter Thirty Two - Daella

"You want to help? There isn't anything you can do to help, it isn't even something that can be helped." I reply.

"Why do you say that?" Aeris asks making me turn to him, something about his expression, the way his dark eyes watch me brings back an image of him, I was touching his face, telling him about how beautiful his eyes are, dark and endless. I blink, looking away from him. Gods did I really do that?

"It isn't something anyone else can help with, I just need to make sure I play my part well enough so Varis is happy and Mistress is happy and I make it to the selection." I explain.

"Play your part?" Aeris asks.

"Yes, one of the other chosen, Fynley, she explained it to me like being in a play, that we each have a part to play, to pretend to be a character for the audience, that we need to play the part well enough so the audience is happy. It made sense when she explained it." I say feeling silly. I can still see his face in my memories, he was smiling at me, holding my hand, his fire magic danced around the bonfires.

"It makes perfect sense Dae," Alvaryn says interrupting my thoughts as I look up at him. "That is what you meant by you don't pretend when you're with us, right?" I nod. "So when you are with the others you just play a part, then when you are with me or Aeris you are just yourself?" I nod again.

"And you just intend to keep doing that until the selection?" Aeris asks.

"Yes, once I am chosen by someone then I will be safe, he couldn't make me disappear." I answer.

"We're sorry we didn't know the truth sooner." Alvaryn's voice soft and sad and I see two dark thunder clouds framed in thick dark lashes in my mind from last night, he was looking down at me angry and upset.

"It wouldn't make any real difference, even now, knowing doesn't make a difference to either of you, or to me." I say quietly trying to remember the rest of the memory, why he had been upset, was it when I had told him about Varis?

"It makes all the difference." Aeris snaps standing suddenly. "Varis had no right threatening you like that, he is an advisor to the king not judge, jury and executioner. You are a chosen and are to be treated like an honoured guest, not be terrified you will simply disappear if you step out of line."

I watch as he paces back and forth. I hadn't seen him this angry before, or anything close to it.

"Aeris is right, he has no right to threaten you, you have done nothing to deserve it." Alvaryn continues.

"Of course she hasn't done anything to deserve it!" Aeris calls out.

"Aeris," Alvaryn says in a warning tone. "We just wanted you to know that you are not alone in all of this, that we will be here to help in any way that we can."

"Again, there isn't anything either of you can do to help." I remind them. "As much as I appreciate the offer."

"She's right," Aeris says coming to stand in front of us. "What can we do to help her? We can't tell anyone, we can't go to Demwyn or Father, we can't go directly to Varis and make him disappear. Now we all know and neither of us can do a damn thing about it."

"I don't think I should have told either of you, it isn't going to help, if anything its only making things worse, now both of you know and neither of you can do anything and Aeris is getting angry and you shouldn't be." I say, watching as he starts pacing back and forth again. He stops and looks down at me.

"I shouldn't be angry?" He asks. "How can you think that? He threatened your life, of course I should be angry, he should be in some dark deep hole somewhere begging for reprieve from all the pain and suffering he is receiving."

"Is that truly what you want to do to him?" I ask softly, images of Varis in chains and bleeding everywhere while begging for his life while Aeris stands over him watching fill my mind.

"There are a great many things I would like to do to him if I was given the opportunity and all of them involve him screaming in pain and agony. However, my brother has advised that it wouldn't be in my best interest to attack the King's advisor and start torturing him at this point in time." He smiles tightly before sitting in his chair and running his hands over his face.

"What Aeris is trying to say is that if we could, we would make sure you never have to worry about Varis again, but we do not have that power." Alvaryn says pulling me away from Aeris as he pulls out a dagger and starts spinning it in his hands. I had never seen him like this before, he was always so in control, so confident and carefree. This version of him was dark and dangerous and bloodthirsty, he belonged on a battlefield not couped up in this place unable to quench his thirst.

"Thank you, I think, I'm not too happy about all the new images in my head of blood and torture, and while the idea of having Varis gone would make me feel better I know it is impossible." I say trying to shove the vivid images away.

"I think it's better that we know as well because now we both can make sure we play our part as well." Alvaryn continues, watching Aeris from the corner of his eye.

"What do you mean?"

"Just that we will both be more careful when spending time with you, and when we are all at an event together we will make sure to spend the appropriate amount of time with you as well as with the other chosen." Alvaryn explains.

"Yes, we will all play this game together." Aeris mutters, clearly unhappy with the idea of just going along with everything.

"It's the safest option we have for Dae." Alvaryn says looking at Aeris with meaning before turning back to me.

"I really didn't mean to get either of you involved in this." I say softly looking at my hands on my lap. That was the last thing I wanted.

Aeris lets out a sigh while putting his dagger back in his belt and turning towards me, he leans forward and holds out his hands towards me, I take them hesitantly.

"Dearest, you have done nothing wrong, please believe me when I say that. I would rather know about this then know nothing at all. While I am not happy with our plan going forward, Alvaryn is right, it is the safest option for you and that is what is most important to me." He squeezes my hands and I nod and smile at him trying to make myself believe his words.

"Right, I'm glad I know as well, it has helped explain so much that I didn't have answers to, and now we know what is going on you don't have to keep anything from us." Alvaryn says making me pull my hands free from Aeris and sit up straight.

"Thank you, both of you, I just, you both should be focussing on the selection, not worrying about any of this." I say, fidgeting with my fingers in my lap.

"You are right Dearest." Aeris says making Alvaryn look at him with a questioning expression before turning back to me.

"Don't worry about either of us, we will take care of ourselves, just stay away from Varis if you can, and come find either one of us if he says something to you again." Alvaryn insists and I nod, not sure if I would follow his words but wanting to make him think I agree.

This is not what I wanted to happen, I had expected to get through the last couple of weeks and enjoy my time with Aeris and Alvaryn before the selection and then say my goodbyes and start my new life.

Them finding out was not part of that plan, and now I don't know how to feel about it. What if they do something, what if Aeris can't keep his anger in check and tries to approach Varis? What if Varis finds out they know? Gods I would disappear, I wouldn't get to say goodbye, everything would be over.

Ijust had to keep playing my part, make sure Varis doesn't suspect anything. Mytime at the palace was almost over and soon I would be free from Varis. Itwould mean losing Alvaryn and Aeris as well, but I always knew that time wouldcome.