To The Friends That Didn't Stay

Forget Her For A While (2021)

My heart had shattered long ago,
I had forgotten how to be.
Sometimes I would laugh for a moment,
But no one could humour me.

The colour was drawn from my world,
My life a greyscale scene.
All my thoughts preoccupied,
With what we could have been.

I felt so much anger,
My mind full of rage.
If our story was in print,
There'd be tears on every page.

I didn't want to love her anymore,
I was forever in so much pain.
No matter what I did or who I met,
I couldn't shake her from my brain.

She was all I ever knew,
She was my pride and joy.
She built my confidence up,
Which she later would destroy.

She was mine for so long,
The only love I had ever known.
Even though to all the world,
She was just some pixels on my phone.

I didn't want to love again,
I became so very cold.
I would watch the world be happy,
As I bitterly grew old.

I again became so selfish,
A trait she made me forget.
As I wanted to make her happy,
Ever since the day we met.

I forgotten how to socialise,
I locked myself away
I spoke to not a soul,
As my sadness grew day by day.

But then I met someone,
It was much out of the blue.
And without even trying he did something,
That no one else was able to do.

He made my happiness so genuine,
He actually made me smile.
And for once in so many months,
He made me forget her for a while.

He had so much patience,
And he was like no other.
But I didn't love him romantically-
I loved him like a little brother.

He was also lonely,
His love had left him too.
She was his everything,
And now he didn't know what to do.

Together we grew stronger,
And inseparable we became.
We did everything together,
And stayed up each night to play our game. 

We'd play truth or dare and hangman,
And we'd sleep while on call.
And having him my life made me happy,
I felt like I had it all.

But months went by and he got quiet,
And he hardly would reply.
As I lay in my bed, alone again,
All I could really do was cry.

Was in something that I did?
Or maybe something I said?
Where in the world has he gone?
Is he alive or dead?

Did he get bored of me?
Leaving without words just like the other.
It felt like a stab in my heart so deep,
I had lost my little brother.

Then I got a notification,
After what felt like forever.
His new profile picture-
Him and a girl smiling together.

"Hey" he said bluntly,
"How have you been?" I replied.
Pretending to be okay,
We won't tell him how much I cried.

"I got a girlfriend" he explained,
"I have noticed" I angrily said.
"You could of told me you were okay,
I started to think you were dead".

After that his replies were sparse,
And I felt so very crappy.
But I sucked it up and smiled,
Because I know someone I loved, was happy.

That brings us to now,
And things aren't the same.
Weeks go by without a word,
All alone I play my game.

To the best friend I once had,
Thank you with all my heart.
You took my loneliness away,
Even though we're far apart.

I'm happy you found love again,
It makes me glad to hear.
The glisten that is in your eyes,
And your grin from ear to ear.

But if you have an hour to spare,
Could you do one last thing for me...
Call me up and talk about old times,
Like how things used to be.

Let's just play Minecraft together,
Or talk about the Sims and such-
Because no one else gets me like you,
And I miss you so damn much.

Whether a minute or an hour,
Any time with you would make me smile,
Because I know when I talk to you,
I can forget her for a while.