The Lycan's Mark

Chapter Fifty Six

My requests to a higher power to bring my dad back was futile as expected but that didn't stop me from begging God to bring him back. I would do anything to have more time with my dad, anything and everything.

There had to be another way to bring him back, maybe we could use magic? It had never been done before but we could still try. That idea was shot down very quickly by Vladamir which only made me revert back to the anger stage. Why was he refusing to entertain the idea when this was all his fault in the first place?

The sadness and feeling hopeless didn't come next because it was already there and co-existing with the other stages. People say the sadness and pain would come in waves and there will be times where, even if it's for a minute, you wouldn't feel the anguish and sorrow but they're wrong. It was a constant feeling and covered every inch of me like it was glued onto my body and soul. It was unshakeable and every minute it got heavier and heavier, pushing me more further down until I was as low as I could possibly get.

How do you move on from this sort of pain? A pain so crippling that it physically takes you down, a pain so strong that it feels like someone has taken hold of my heart and is squeezing it with all their might.

Acceptance. That was the last stage, the final aspect of grief. It's not that the pain of loss has gone but instead we're no longer resisting the new reality of what is now our life. All the other aspects of grief may linger now but it won't be as dominate as before.

But how am I supposed to accept this?

How am I supposed to continue living without my dad?

"Leanne?" The male voice was low and collected. "You need to eat something."

I ignored the suggestion as I continued sitting in the large armchair I had been occupying for the last couple of days. My appetite was no longer there, I didn't want to eat, I didn't want to move, I didn't want to do anything.

A hand grasped my shoulder and gave it a tight squeeze. "Leanne."

"I'm not hungry." I muttered as my eyes stayed fixated on my mum's figure. She was still in the hospital bed covered in wires and tubes, her body so still that at times I wondered if she was still alive, it was the sound of the machine monitoring her heartbeat that put me slightly at ease.

The doctor had explained why she had not woken up yet but the information they had relayed to me did not register in my mind as I was having a hard time processing any information, all I knew was that she would make a full recovery and she would be okay.

But would she?

Once she woke up and found out that my dad, her husband, was dead would she be okay?

Would she ever be okay?

Would we?

Would she blame me for this?

She would be well within her right to do so. I'm the one who brought this into their perfect and safe life, I did this to them.

"You need to eat." Vladamir's voice was much more firm this time. "Starving yourself will not do anyone any good. You need your strength."

My eyes drifted away from my mum's bruised face to Vladamir's concerned one. "My strength?"

Vladamir nodded towards my mum. "Your mother will need your strength and your support."

I don't think I had an ounce of strength left inside me, even if I did, there was nothing I could do to ease the pain my mum would feel once she found out. Her life's about to change for the worse and the person she relied on for strength and support was gone.

In a way I was slightly jealous of her, she was blissfully unaware and ignorant of the situation we were in. The only time the anguish and sorrow didn't take hold of my body and squeeze it was when I was asleep, not that I was able to sleep much anyway.

"She's going to blame me for what happened." I uttered my thoughts out loud and watched as Vladamir frowned. "She's going to hate me."

"Your mother will not blame or hate you." The hand that was on my shoulder squeezed me again.

I shook my head and turned to look at my mum. "My dad was everything to my mum, he was her whole world."

And now because of me her whole world was gone.

I wouldn't fault her if she did blame me for this once she found out why the man broke into their house and attacked them. That was another thing I would have to explain to her, why they were attacked in the first place.

I was unsure of how I was going to tell her that supernatural creatures existed and that Vladamir was a Lycan who had mated with me and now I was going to live forever. Everything that I would have to tell her would shatter her sense of reality and her world.

Maybe I could ask my aunt to tell her? After all she was mated to a Werewolf, has been with him for years and would be able to answer any questions mum had properly.

I closed my eyes as I realised that she had no idea that my dad was gone, the only people who knew were the people in this hospital. How was I supposed to tell her that her brother was gone? Would she blame me too?

"I can't do it." I whispered as tears began to fill my eyes. "I can't tell them that he's gone."

"Them?"

Closing my eyes, I allowed the tears to slide down my cheeks. "My mum, my aunt, my family, his friends, the neighbours, his work colleagues, people he knew. How am I supposed to tell them he's gone?"

It was bad enough that I would have to tell my mum about what happened to my dad but I don't think I was strong enough to keep repeating what happened over and over again. It would be like reopening the same wound and pouring salt on it over and over.

Before I could continue or Vladamir could say something a small whimper filled my ear and had me opening my eyes in a flash.

"Mum!" I jumped up from the seat and loomed over her, watching as her eyes fluttered slightly and her head moved to the side. "Mum can you hear me?"

She groaned again, this time her voice louder than before. Her eyes opened slowly before closing again.

"Mum?" My hands were trembling as I grabbed one of hers gently. "If you can hear me, squeeze my hands."

Her hand remained limp in my hands as she continued to groan. Her eyes opened a few times but kept closing after a second of fluttering open.

"Come on mum, open your eyes." I pleaded as tears streamed freely down my cheeks. "Please open your eyes."

As if she heard my pleading, her eyes opened and remained open. They were unfocused, moving side to side for a several seconds before focusing in our direction.

"Mum!" I cried out as I squeezed her hands, not believing that she was actually awake.

The joy and happiness I felt barely lasted a few seconds.

"Who are you?"

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A/N: I hope you guys liked this chapter 

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I will upload again towards the end of the week but you can read the full story and the start of Luca's story on www.patreon.com/kayy_b or on my subscription page on www.inkitt.com/kayy_b

Thank you for reading :)

-Kayy xx