THE OFFER (HE CAN'T REFUSE) ☆ KIMCHAY AU

Chapter Six ⁜ Embracing the Fall

And on days when Chay doesn't hallucinate about a crazy mob boss watching him, his thoughts once or twice wander towards the box that he forgot in that damn restaurant. Chay doesn't want to contact Kim yet. He wants to give Kim a little more time to figure out if he really means it seriously with Chay. It's not only for Kim's own good but for Chay's as well. Chay is already falling. Slowly but surely, he is. If he wasn't, he wouldn't be thinking about those couple of kisses so much. He wouldn't think about Kim every time he is watching a crime show, listening to a podcast about the most brutal criminal cases, or reading an article online. He definitely wouldn't think about Kim almost all the time. So, yes, Chay is falling. And the last thing he wants is to get hurt.

And yes, technically, he can text Kim and pretend it's only about the box, but he has a feeling that both of them would know that it's way more than that. So Chay tries his best to distract himself from staring at Kim's number. He obviously does the usual uni things. He hangs out with his classmates. Goes with them to the cinema. Spends an unhealthy amount of time in the bookstore. He reads a lot. He writes a lot. In the past week, he wrote five songs, and all of them are actually pretty good, according to his professor. Trying to distract himself from Kim actually made Chay productive. Who would have guessed that?

It's the worst at night. Usually, just before he falls asleep. After scrolling through his socials and rolling his eyes over the group chat he has with his classmates, suddenly it's too quiet and too dark, and his fingers by themselves go to his contacts. Three times, he almost sends a text. Just by a miracle, he doesn't press the send button. He is just buying himself time if he is completely honest with himself. He just doesn't want to face reality so soon. What if the distance that Chay is putting between them on purpose will actually make Kim see things in a new light, he realizes that he actually doesn't want Chay at all and his obsession flies out of the window. And in the end, the irony of it all will be that it's gonna be Chay who ends up being obsessed because he can't stop thinking about those stupid kisses they shared.

He should really stop playing with fire and just text Kim. But what should he say? That he misses him? No! No, no, no! He doesn't! Okay, he does, but he can't say that so early on. Or maybe he can—Chay groans and rolls over in his bed from his stomach to his back. It's half past ten at night and Chay should be studying for the last exam of the semester, however, he somehow finds lying in bed in the dark and staring at his contacts list way more intriguing.

What is Kim doing right now? Is he already asleep? No. Chay almost laughs at that. It's too early for the mob boss to be asleep. When does the mob boss even sleep? Do people like that sleep the same hours as normal people, or are they more vampire-like? Maybe Kim is committing the worst types of crime in the shadows, covered by the darkness of a night sky... Okay, Chay, you really need to get a grip! He sits up, staring at the wall. What if Kim is sleeping but not alone? Chay immediately pushes that thought away. Kim promised him, and Chay might be stupid to trust Kim, but he does. He trusts Kim. Maybe Kim is just having late dinner or hanging out with someone. Or maybe he is in bed as well, thinking about Chay.

Chay groans and throws himself back in his sheets. He isn't tired enough to sleep yet. Maybe he should watch something.

He spends the next thirty minutes deciding what to watch, and then he settles on continuing his third rewatch of Criminal Minds. But if Chay wanted to take his mind off Kim, he should have gone for a TV show that doesn't involve crime!

"I'm fucked," Chay groans and picks up his phone. "I guess it's time to text my boyfriend."

His hands are shaking with a mix of excitement and nervousness as he types the text. The most important thing is to sound casual and not desperate at all. Cool. That won't be a problem.