It's You

Chapter 14

Combat.

Genocide.

Natural disasters.

All of those were unlikely for Gaon to have either experienced or witnessed so Yohan gladly crossed them out of hid list.

Serious financial troubles.

With what he had left for the younger, Gaon could have retired already without a single worry.

Death of a loved one.

Soohyun. He couldn't shake the thought that her death could possibly be the catalyst for Gaon's amnesia. Nevertheless, it left him aching to think her death had been so traumatic Gaon's mind thought the best way to protect himself from further pain was to erase his entire being.

Tremendous internal conflict such as turmoil over guilt-ridden impulses or actions.

Well... Yohan didn't like thinking back to the things he'd made the younger do. Even though he'd wanted Gaon on his side, he hadn't hesitated to use him.

It was likely that his actions were another catalyst, another reason that had forced Gaon to find salvation in no other way but to forget. If that was true, if Gaon would later tell him Yohan had indeed been vital in keeping his memories suppressed, if Yohan had made Gaon hate himself that much... Yohan would never forgive himself. He'd live in hell for the rest of his pathetic life, atoning for the one crime he'd regret: turning that kind man into a person he couldn't stand.

"I can see you thinking, Hyung. Stop it."

Surprised, Yohan glanced down, locking eyes with a now awake Gaon. With a soft smile on his face the younger yawned slightly, seemingly entirely undisturbed by the position he'd woken up in like it was an everyday occurrence to wake in Yohan's lap with his fingers in his hair, like this didn't completely cross every boundary that was normal.

It left Yohan reeling, trying not to drown in an ocean when he forgot how to swim. God, he couldn't think any longer about how natural it felt to have the younger in his arms because if he did he might do something stupid like pulling him up and stealing a taste of those plump lips or leaning down, caging the little fawn so he finally realised he was Yohan's.

"Hyung?"

Shaking his head disbelieving, Yohan banished those thoughts and anything that may bring them back into the deepest and darkest part of his mind, returning his attention to the worried man before him. The realisation must have fried his brain or something.

"Did you sleep well?" he instead asked, hand reluctantly slipping from the younger's head.

He should bring some distance between them, regain some level of professionalism, right? It would only do them well when Gaon remembered. So why did it feel like a terrible mistake?

"I always sleep well when you're around, Hyung," admitted Gaon cheerfully, cheeks a soft pink as he stared at Yohan.

Suddenly, he frowned, eyebrows furrowing as he inquired shyly: "Did it bother you?"

"Huh? What do you mean?"

Gaon couldn't possibly mean... if anything Gaon should be the one feeling uncomfortable being so vulnerable in front of the devil. After all, Yohan was the one who had carried him without permission, even refusing to let him go after waking up. God, he hadn't even considered what Gaon would feel! He'd just felt compelled to keep him, to hold on for a while longer, to feel that strange flame just for a minute more – now he knew what it had been that strange, fierce possessiveness for the brunet. But he hadn't considered Gaon's feelings at all, and even ordered him to put his arms around Yohan's neck. What if Gaon had wanted to be let down? What if he'd felt cornered? Or worse, harassed?! What if Yohan had used his vulnerable state to his own favour?