The Belly of the Beast

Ch. 61, Kill Me

OFFICIAL NOTICE: Anyone caught marking an official posted announcement will be entered into the Letter Trials.

The old me wouldn't have done what I did next.

The old me was dead.

Whoever this new Z was, she was on a level surrounded by beautiful things she hated and beautiful people she didn't know— including Xyla. A Xyla who would let another level die so she could live in comfort.

Something hot and violent twisted inside me. I didn't even realize how angry I was until I found myself pounding on the door the guards had led me to, and it opened to frame Dagger.

I stepped forward and pressed my lips against his.

For a moment he tensed, and my head nearly caught up to my body, and stopped this entire thing.

Then his arms wrapped around me, bending my body flush against his, and he kissed me back. His lips moved in confusing patterns against mine, and for just a moment, I was lost here, in this sensation of burning, falling—

I pulled back, my brain realizing I was kissing my partner, my only ally in the entire galaxy.

He didn't release me, his dark eyes smiling down into my own. I suddenly remembered the guards were right behind us, and I cleared my throat and stepped away from him.

"I was looking for you," I said.

"I can see that," he said, a hint of laughter in his voice. "Would you like to come in?"

I nodded and ducked inside, cheeks burning, forcing myself not to fumble my way through an apology.

The room was large, with a tiny kitchen next to a bed, and a door that I guessed led to a private bathroom. The bed was huge, with enough pillows for an entire engineering shift, and walls painted in black and white stripes. Somehow the dark and light color made me feel disorientated, like even the walls here lied. I wondered if they'd assigned me a room, and then decided I didn't care.

"Would you like something to drink?" Dagger said, as if it were perfectly normal I was standing in the middle of his room, after having kissed him with no warning.

"Water would be nice," I managed. He turned on the facet in the kitchen, clear water running free. I winced when some of the clean water ran down the drain. Did he know that in the Belly, they rationed water? He couldn't have. No one who knew what it was like to steal water would have let some of it slide down the pipe unaccounted for. How different we are Dagger, and yet here you are, my only friend in the whole world.

Then he stood before me, handed me the water, and a strange, unexpected feeling turned over inside me. I'd been alone with him several times, but always with the immediate threat of the Letter Trials. Suddenly I didn't know what to say. How did you admit to someone you barely knew that your whole life was a lie? Especially someone that you just kissed? So instead I said nothing, turning the drink in circles in my hands.

"Is everything alright?" he said, breaking the silence.

I stared into those deep eyes, at the secrets they help, and the words slipped out of me, "Have you ever felt like your entire life was a lie?"

He took a deep slow breath, sat down on the bed, and put his head in his hands. "Every single day." He paused. "It was why I entered the Letter Trials."

"Why did you?"

"Because I was guilty. Because I am guilty."

I sat on the bed beside him, a sliver of space between us. And suddenly, I turned to him, meeting that steely gaze with one of my own. "Dag, no matter what you did, no matter who you were, you're my partner. It doesn't matter who we were before this. All that matters is making it to the Top, and stopping them from killing another level. Agreed?"

His eyes watched mine, too dark, too discerning, but then, just when I thought he would tell me to forget this entire thing and brave the trials alone, he nodded. "Agreed."

Then I lifted my glass, and downed it, the empty ache inside not nearly satisfied. "Any chance you've got something stronger than water?"

"I've got some whisky."

Of course you do, Dagger. "Perfect. A glass of that please," I said, as if drinking whisky were a normal occurrence for me. This time I didn't watch him as he poured, I just took the glass and downed it. The whisky burned down my throat and filled my chest with warmth, before I finally knew what I wanted. "I want to break something. Or a lot of things. Any idea where we can do that?"

He paused, and then stood. "Come with me."

There were two guards outside his door, and further down the hallway, another two posted outside another room. One of the doors must have been my room, but I didn't care to find out which.

Dagger led us down the hallway, and through an unmarked door, and instantly the air was filled with scents of bleach and sweat. A large room spread out around us, with concrete floors covered in red rubber mats and other odd equipment.

I'd seen pictures of places like this: gyms. They had them on Old Earth, back in the times when parts of humanity had so much food it turned to fat on their body, while others starved away. Some things never change.

"What is this place?" I stepped deeper into the room, and noticed that among the workout equipment were weapons— swords, spears, bows, daggers, more weapons than I'd ever seen. In the Tuv Pit the weapons had been rusted, and dull, used over and over again; but these weapons looked sharper and cleaner than a surgical blade.

"A training room for Letter Trial combatants." Dagger picked up a sword from a rack. "Care to spar?"

I passed him by, moving to a table where a collection of beautiful knives were laid out. Some of them were small enough I was tempted to hide one in my arm. Behind them was a target.

I picked up a small knife and threw it as hard as I could. It bounced and clattered off the target.

"You don't have to throw it so hard," Dagger said, coming to stand behind me.

"Just because you're named after a knife, doesn't make you an expert." I threw another knife, and then smiled when it landed nearly dead center.

"They named me Dagger because I used to enter in illegal knife fights below my level."

This time I did stop to look at him. Illegal knife fighting sounded exactly like something a bored guard would do. Ever the mystery, aren't you Dagger? "Were you any good?"

The smile left his eyes. "Too good. Word started getting around. My father found out and stopped it."

So he has a father. Does everyone but me? I decided I didn't want to talk anymore, and let myself get lost in the throw, release and thud. Dagger gave me a few pointers, but then seemed to sense I wanted to be left alone. When I was done, Dagger surprised me again, tossing me a sword.

"What do I do with this?" I said, holding it skeptically.

"See if you can kill me."

I raised a single brow. "I thought I already did."

(Hehehe, oh Z, I do love your comments ;) Going to continue updating more often, I think twice a week on Tuesdays and Thursdays!! Please do continue to vote, comment and share!)