Stoic | Donnie x reader | 💜👾✨| rottmnt

What's eating at you Donnie?

"Can you guys stay here for a sec. I wanna talk to Donnie by myself real fast."

The boys nod their heads and continue their discussion of possible future outfits they'll choose. Leo watches you walk away he coyly smirks at your concern for him. He thinks to himself

"Dont push her away Dee"

You head over to Donnie's lab, pass his lab door, and peek inside. You see him sitting in his lab chair, alone, typing on his monitor fiddling with the brain-machine. He hears you in the doorway. His face has a still expression of concentration as he works.
I knock on the doorframe, drawing his attention to me once again.

"Hey Don, what's up?"

Donnie slightly shifts his head in my direction but quickly glances away trying to hide his emotions. He hears the other turtles continuing to talk about their ideal outfits.  He sighs and finishes typing

"I— it. It's nothing"

You knew something was up. He's becoming, slowly, easier to read. You ask yourself.

        (Should you talk about the memory he showed, or should you leave it be?)

     You knew it was eating at him. He wants to say something to you. He stands up opening a new file for the neuron scan. He side-eyes you. You smile. With hesitation, you touch his shoulder to reassure him, but he flinches away. You quickly put your hand back to your side. It's quiet for a brief moment. He sits up and turns his head a quarter way to you to avoid eye contact. He speaks

"A-re you ready for the scan?"

       He seems so stoic. You answer.

"Yes"

      He doesn't look you in the eyes the entire time. His melancholy expression faded, and he forces numbness throughout his being. You can't help but hate that he suppresses. He begins setting up the brain scan. He wipes the grid pad with alcohol and then wipes your hands. You feel how cold his hands are. Before he finishes wiping, you gently squeeze his hand to catch his attention. His eyes shoot up at you.

       "Donnie?"

      He stands quietly looking at you.

       "Are—Are you okay?"

    This question caught him off guard. No one's really asked him that before. He utters softly to you. You can see the prudent reluctance.

       "Y-you wanna know how I'm feeling? Really?"

     With a light action you reach for his other hand. His hand scarcely withdrew unaccustomed to this type of affection. He allows you to take his hand in your own. You stroke the top of his hand with your thumb.

       "Yes, I do."

     He becomes clouded. His face grows confused. He wants you to not care. He wants you to treat him like everyone else does.

      "Why? Why do you care? You shouldn't care. You don't even know me...you're just a stranger? You're- you're just a job for a friend."

       You look puzzled for a second. You look down still holding his hands. This was his defense mechanism. You knew he didn't mean this. You look back up with a small smile.

      "I may be a job, but that doesn't me I don't care. Believe it or not, I do...Genuinely."

      Your warm smile made him grow a subtle tint of red. His face is still hesitant and shocked by your persistence.

      "Now"

     You continue cupping his hands.

      "What's eating at you Donnie?"

He's silent. He sighs and gives in, wiping his face and beginning to confide to you.

"I've only ever mentioned it to Leo....but I never told him how I *shivers* —FELT.....when my girlfriend— EX, cheated on me....it really set in stone how obsolete I was. After that, I kept my distance from everyone even my brothers. I was like my science...easily expendable, disposable"

He looks down, hopeless.

"...forgettable..."

Your eyes tear up from his self-loathing thoughts. You force him to turn toward you, still clenching his hands. You sense his emotions. You know he's hurting. His words confirm it. As he looks down at his hands, you continue holding them and give them another gentle squeeze.

"Donnie, do you know how wrong you are? I can speak for Leo, Mikey, and Raph on this one, There is no one who can replace you— No one in this entire world is capable of filling your shoes. Just because one person did you dirty doesn't mean every other person will. Don't let her define who you are and don't let her mistakes define your future. You have value, whether you like it or not people do want you around...i want you around."

His eyes flicker up to yours. There's a tiny hint of hope in his eyes. His face becomes slightly less stoic. You continue holding his hands and try to come up with words to say. There's not much. The only words you feel like saying at that moment are.

"I'm here for you."

His face is now a shade of pink. He looks down shying away from your consoling stare. This caused you to let out a small, barely audible chuckle. You didn't know how shy he was when being comforted. He then lifts his face up to look at you. He has an expression of cautious hope. He wants to ask you a question he's been dying to know, but fears getting rejected. You look at his face, trying to read the question in his eyes. You ask.

"Is- is it cool if we hug?"

He thinks back, remembering how tolerable giveing a warm, consolidating embrace to you was. His eyes flicker as he nods in response to you. You're both relieved. He slowly puts his arms around your waist.
He holds them at your hips, gradually moving them up your back. You follow, hugging tightly. There is a feeling of mutual affection, a feeling of shared affection. He speaks to you with his face buried by your shoulder.

"Thank you."