runaway || bkdk

chapter 1

Seems like everyone else but me is happy

It hurts more to laugh than to cry

I try to hold it in, I try to endure, every day

But it's not easy, right now, I need your hand

-

'Why can't I be happy?'

Izuku finds himself asking that question more and more frequently. Seeing his friends and classmates around him, shoulders jolting with laughter, cheeks hurting from smiling too much, he wonders; why can't he experience the same?

It's not like he's had it rough, he's surrounded by people who love and care for him, he achieved his dreams. There's no reason for him to feel like this.

Right?

As he leans further into the wall of the class 3-A common room, viridian eyes scanning the crowd of the rest of class 3-A, taking in the moment of their final moments as students. Graduation was upon them, merely days away and the beginning of their hero careers dawning on them like the sunrise after a stormy night. It hadn't been easy, the hardships of their time studying at UA was unlike any other, with the principle himself admitting he'd never wished for them to have gone through just as much as they had to. Izuku would be lying to himself if he said he knew they'd all make it- what with his classmates suffering horrendous injuries and phycological torment not even a year into their high school lives- the relief of them all staying alive and together was unlike any other feeling.

Seeing as it was finally the weekend, all exams completed and almost forgotten about, they'd decided to host an end of year party for the entire third year hero course, with both class 3-A and 3-B currently mingling together in the shared space of the common room.

Izuku was content, he really was, or as much as he could be with the feeling of dread weighing at the back of his mind with no explanation behind its presence. A plastic cup clamped in his hand, leaning further and further still into the wall, his eyes settle on a particular head of ash blond spikes, currently situated on the sofa in the middle of all the action, leaning carelessly on his red-headed friend as they talk quietly amongst themselves.

A sigh leaves his lips as his mind wanders. What did he do wrong all those years ago? Why did he reach out to Katsuki all those years ago under the rotten log? Why did he continue to reach out, knowing that rejection was always going to be the response?

Those same questions revolve around his mind like a broken record, seeing how Eijiro managed to breakdown those barriers in a matter of weeks, compared to the 14 years and counting the Izuku has had to endure.

He didn't realise he was still staring until crimson eyes are locking back onto his, the blond having fully turned around to stare back. He swallowed thickly, breathing slightly heavier as Katsuki's gaze bore into him. He was transfixed, unable to look away as he watched his childhood friend's face morph into a scowl, catching the attention of Eijiro, who simply followed his stare and waved happily at Izuku, beckoning him closer.