my mechanic (kirkhammettxjameshetfield)

4

I squeezed his hand hoping to give him some strength. He took a moment to compose himself and I really nervous for what was about to come out of his mouth.

"Well you can guess that that never happened
but we would always sneak out to see each
other. There were some boys who picked on me
cause they knew I was gay but Jason would
always stand up to them for me. One day we
met in the attic after lights out, Jason didn't
want to, but he also proposed the idea of sex
and of course I wanted it so I convinced him.
There were consequences if you were caught
outside of your room and we knew it but it was
just us. We were about to fuck when this group
of boys, 2 years older than us, walked in." He frowned and I knew where this was headed. He took deep breaths and wiped some tears with his free hand.

"They we're going to report us and I begged
them not to cause I was to scared of what they
were gonna do when my brother Cliff ran in.
He always knew when we were in danger but
this time he couldn't save us. So he offered to
put himself in jeopardy to save the both of us.
They ran and told the headmaster that Cliff
and Jason were both naked on a mattress. So
of course they were put in the corner, which is
where they throw you in this tiny room in the
corner and starve you until they decided
your.... your p-punishment." I could feel him losing his composure. He looked away and we sat in silence. It was tense, really tense. I felt bad for whatever happened and was gonna tell James he doesn't have to tell me the rest when he said this-

"They shot them with a shotgun, in front of my
face." I blinked and was full of shock. I saw tears falling from his eyes and landing onto his jeans. He was silent which broke my heart to see him this way. Maybe I should talk about my dad? No, no this is about James, just make him feel okay. But I kind of didn't know how. Everything was so different with James. He was truly broken compared to the women he's held crying about little things they'd probably forget the next morning.

He looked at me with tears just rolling down his cheek. I didn't know how to respond I felt like I was invading privacy. I should've never asked, I shouldn't have made him cry like this.

"I remember picking brains off of my face,
showering and blood and all kinds of body
matter going down the sink." He said he was laughing. I wanted him to stop. I thought of kissing him but are we even at that type of relationship? We fucked, I sucked his dick? No, no don't kiss him just let him get it out.

He laid his head on my shoulder and I hugged him and pulled him closer to me so that our bodies are touching. I felt him lean into it and relax. His breathing was calmer and I could feel his heart beating at a good, probably better, rate. I let my hands circle around his body, I could feel everything since he was shirtless. I tried not to make my temptation to feel his bare body well known and stuck to keeping my hands around his chest. I also thought about kissing his neck since it was exposed but again I thought against it.

So I sat there with James in my arms again, kind of. But I knew I couldn't stay as long as I did yesterday. I would kill to stay for a little longer. I wanted this to last forever. I was well aware of my thoughts and feelings for James, it's more intense than anything i've ever felt. All of my dreams, all the seconds i've spent thinking about him.

I sighed and nudged James softly. He looked up at me and hummed.

"I gotta go, work. I'll see you." I said.

I frowned as he got off of me. He looked at me like he wanted to tell me something but his mouth stayed shut.

I walked to my truck and drove back in silence. My body felt cold and I knew it was because I missed James's body warmth.

I trudged into the shop and into my room. I didn't feel like showering and collapsed onto the pull out. It was dark and it was silent. I wasn't tired and I regret not staying but I'd be up for so long if I stayed, at least I can lull myself to sleep here. I closed my eyes and let myself drift, listening to the AC run. I didn't dream though really I woke up in the middle of night feeling like I haven't gotten a lick of sleep. I groaned into the pillow, obviously annoyed with my inability to just sleep.