Short Stories

The Last Time

Hey! Here's another one. 

TW suicide, mental health, drugs

***

It was a cold day for a July afternoon. My coat was almost not enough to keep me warm. I was hanging out with my group of friends, as usual, smoking shit, and drinking like a bad habit. Being stupid and reckless. Just spending time together, replacing the family I'd never had. Nothing could hold me back.

Or so I thought. I was breathing-in a puff of smoke when I saw her.

Finally noticing me, she turned her head and locked gaze with mine, for what seemed like forever. Forever usually sounded like paradise. But this time, I couldn't bare the pain in her eyes and the tears swelling them up. Something was wrong.

She always felt like she would never belong with my group of friends. I never pushed. I just wanted her. Wanted to be with her. I didn't mind that no one knew her. She was my secret, my own little solace. So, I knew she would never come closer.

I walked up to her. She was shaking. Taking off my jacket, I realized that wasn't it. She wasn't cold. Her body was shaken by sobs, heavy breathing, anxiety. I threw my jacket on a nearby bench, getting closer to her, capturing her chin on the tip of my fingers.

- Sunshine, what's wrong? I asked.

She sniffled slightly. I noticed that her usual necklace was missing around her delicate neck. My thumb brushed softly over the place the pendant should have been, she flinched. I took her trembling hands in mine, hoping to soothe them up. I closed my fingers around her palm.

- I –huh –I have to go... she whispered. I have to, hum, see... meet with, hum... I have to–

- Go. I finished for her, and she nodded. Can I come with?

Her eyes widened as her head started shaking 'no' slightly.

- Nah, I'm good. She replied breathing out.

I let go of her hands reluctantly.

- Hayley, be careful, ok? I called out but she was already gone.

I quickly put my coat back on and joined the others. I could see the questions in their eyes, but really didn't feel like answering any of them. Their voices couldn't reach me when they spoke up. My mind was elsewhere. It was with her, remembering her face, wondering where she had gone to. I felt in my heart I should have insisted. I should have followed her. But I didn't. Or maybe should I have told her to stay for a while. It could have been a good time to introduce her to my family. But again, I didn't.

My mind was already wandering when we started walking along the Seine. Aimee was asking questions about Hayley, jealous, possessive. Although I wasn't hers and never was. I never wanted her. Or never fell in her game.

Never liked her like I loved Hayley. And I had just let her go God knows where and to do what?

- Yo, Miles, Tony called out and I hummed in response throwing my cigarette away. Isn't that your friend from before?

My head snapped in the direction he was showing me. She had her hoodie on her head and hands in her pockets.

I knew that place.

I freaking knew that place.

For a moment, I gave her the benefit of the doubt. Could have been some sort of shortcut? Could have been she knew someone who lived in that street.

But when she entered the narrow street, I waited. I needed to see. For a few moments I didn't move. Then, I saw her head popping out of the alley. I ran to her.