UNFORGIVEN (FORSAKEN #1)

gloom and doom

I pushed the heavy cart filled with books, I couldn't help but let out a deep sigh. This morning's assembly had left everyone in a state of shock, and I was still reeling from it. Despite hearing whispers about the situation before, like when I go grocery shopping or walk around the neighbourhood, I had never realised the severity of it until now.

As I sorted through the books and placed them in their rightful places, I let out another sigh when I caught sight of two comic books lodged in between the history books, clearly not belonging there. I couldn't help but feel a sense of annoyance as I removed them from their incorrect spot, but as I did, my eyes were immediately drawn to Jaeyun through the gaps in the books.

I placed the comic books in the cart and rounded the corner, finding Jaeyun reading alone at a study table. He was engrossed in his book, but something about it seemed different from the one he had read yesterday. The cover looked a little darker, but perhaps that was just the lighting?

I can picture the sun's warm rays shining down on Jaeyun's face, highlighting his delicate features and casting a golden hue upon his beautiful blonde hair. The effect would be so otherworldly, as if he were a celestial being. The sun's light would dance across his skin, illuminating every curve and contour, creating a stunning display of natural beauty. But it's not sunny today. How unfortunate.

Wow, that's a little creepy (and stalkerish) of me to have that thought.

I shake my head, trying to clear my thoughts, and look away from him. My eyes land on a random book on the shelf, and I reach out to take it out. The book's cover catches my attention – it's an art book about the Renaissance. I flip through the pages, admiring the pictures of different art pieces from that time and their meanings behind them.

Suddenly, the sound of a book closing startles me out of my thoughts, and I look back to see Jaeyun staring out the window. I can't help but wonder what he's looking at. What could be so captivating outside to make him completely zone out like this? I glance out the window, and it's all gloom and doom outside. The grey skies and dark clouds seem to match the sombre mood in the air.

The bell tower rings, its sound echoing throughout the campus. He's unfazed. He turns back to his book and continues reading.

I put the book away and take a deep breath. Summoning all my courage, my feet move on their own as I approach Jaeyun. My mind goes blank as I stand in front of him. I place my hands on the chair, feeling the coldness of it underneath my touch. But why isn't it cooling me down? I suddenly feel warm, and I can't help but wonder if my face is turning red. I speak without thinking, "Hi, you're ... the boy from the church right?" Nothing. He doesn't even look up. I clear my throat, "Um, you know the one in Yongsan –"

"Nagasaki," I hear the librarian hiss my name. I quickly turn around and catch her menacing look. She wants me to get back to work.

Jaeyun lets out a breath and closes his book behind me. For some reason, I flinch at the sound, but I don't turn around. "You should focus on your job if you have time to talk to me."

I swallow nothing. My courage deflates like a balloon. "Right, sorry."

Taking a deep breath, I walk back the way I came, my heart racing with a mix of excitement and disbelief. My mind is still processing the fact that he spoke to me for the first time.