All The Love Songs About You - Englot

Chapter 24: 8 months

"Hey, Nima," she interrupted, interjecting into the ongoing conversation. "How's Saffron doing? It's been a while since we've all seen her."

Nima's face instantly lit up, a hint of surprise gleaming in her eyes. "Oh, Saffron! She's doing really well, actually. She's been seeing — cough" Nima started but suddenly stopped, choking on air it seems.

Intrigued, I prodded. "She's been seeing...what?"

Nima took a gulp of her drink, then laughed like she got caught doing something she wasn't supposed to. "She's been seeing...her mom! She's seeing her mom a lot!"

"Oh that's awesome then." Thalia said, glancing not so secretly at me, gauging my reaction. Weird.

"Yep totally! She's closer to her mom now that they live closer to each other." Nima said, still chuckling awkwardly, leaning back in Caoimhe's arms. "I'm really proud of her, she's a music editor-in-chief now, that's been her dream for as long as I've known her." Nima added, happy for her best friend.

Listening to Nima speak about Saffron, I couldn't help but feel a mix of longing and bittersweet nostalgia. Memories of our time together flooded my mind, casting a shadow over the room.

Heidi chimed in, "It's so great to hear that she's fulfilling her dreams. I know how much that means to her."

I couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy hearing about Saffron's success. Did she think about me at all? Did she ever wonder about how I was doing or if I had moved on? I tried to push those thoughts aside and focus on the conversation at hand.

Caoimhe noticed me fidgeting and asked, "Erynn, you okay?"

I nodded, trying to come up with a response that didn't sound too forced. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just happy to hear that Saffron is doing well." I couldn't hide the slight tremor in my voice as I delicately mentioned her name, pretending it was just nothing.

My words were met with silence, and I knew that everyone could see right through my façade. It was no secret that I was still hung up on Saffron, even months after our breakup. But no one said anything, instead, they all just exchanged knowing glances and went back to talking.

As the night wore on, I found myself lost in my thoughts, wondering what Saffron was doing at this very moment, and if she ever misses me the way that I miss her.

But I knew that regardless of how I felt, life moved on, and I had to learn to do the same. Maybe one day, I would be able to look back on our relationship with fondness instead of sadness, but that day wasn't today. So for now, I just had to take comfort in the fact that Saffron is doing well and that her dreams are coming true, even if they didn't involve me.

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During a concert...

The bright lights dimmed and the crowd erupted in applause as our band, Quirky Stevens, finished our last song of the night. The four of us stood on stage, breathing hard, as we took in the cheers and whoops of the audience. I couldn't help but smile at how far we had come, from getting kicked out of dive bars to playing at sold-out shows.

As we walked off the stage, I couldn't help but feel emotional. My heart was beating fast, and I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes. My bandmates looked at me with concern, but they knew what had happened.

It seemed like everything had hit me all at once, all the pent up frustration, stress, and heartbreak this past months all came crashing down on me and I was unsure how to deal with it.

As we reached our backstage room, I tried to compose myself, but it was a tough task.

"Are you okay?" Thalia asked, putting her hand on my arm, concern etched on her face.