Loneliness - K.V

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I tend to ignore my loneliness
and suppress my heart's distress.
Avoiding feelings, far and wide
in a fragile emotional tide.

But within, voids grow
a state where I keep my head low.
I sit and ponder, feeling lost
in the shadows, emotions tossed.

The hole within my heart
grows deeper, tearing me apart.
Yet I choose to turn a blind eye
to shield myself, I often try.

For the pain it brings is too much to bear
a weight too heavy, too hard to share.
I'd rather hide behind my mask
than confront the sorrows of my past.

Naïve I remain to my emotions
avoiding life's raw commotions.
Confrontations, I abhor and fear
especially when the mirror is near.

But amidst this self-imposed seclusion
I find solace in my own illusion.
Loneliness becomes my quiet retreat
where my weary soul finds a moment's beat.

In solitude, my thoughts take flight
unburdened by the world's daylight.
A respite from the chaos outside
where I forgot the expectations I must abide.

Yet deep within my guarded soul
a longing stirs, it takes its toll.
A yearning to connect and be known
to reap the seed of love once sown.

Sometimes, in the quietest of nights
when the stars paint the sky with their gentle light.
Yearning whispers through my soul
a desire to be held, to feel whole.

In the midst of my self-imposed isolation
I ponder the beauty of human relations.
The laughter shared, tears embraced
the comfort found in another's warm embrace.

Yet fear grips me, like a vice so tight
What if vulnerability leads to a painful fight?
What if the love I seek only brings more pain
leaving me broken, shattered, with nothing to gain?

So I retreat further into my fortress
where loneliness becomes my witness.
I cocoon myself in the solace it provides
shielding myself from the risks love implies.

But deep down, a flicker of hope remains
a flame that refuses to be satisfied by pains.
For in every heart, there lies a dormant spark
yearning to ignite, to brighten the dark.

And so, I tread the path of introspection
exploring the depths of my emotional reflection.
Though stumbling through darkness, I may tread
I'll embrace the risk and face what lies ahead.

Perhaps one day, I'll find the courage to embrace
the vulnerability that love seeks to trace.
To open my heart, to let other back in
and discover the beauty that connection can bring.

But until then, I'll keep my solitude near
as I navigate this journey without fear.
Embracing the peace it offers my weary mind
and finding solace in the loneliness I find.

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