Sinners' Kingdom #1: The Book of Lust (Complete)

64

Time was my enemy, not theirs. The urgency was for my sake only. The moment they realized that, the moment they understood that I was actually a high-investment, low-return burden, and that their egos were the only things blinding them to that—

I had to get out of here before that happened. There was no way I was going to be left stranded in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by man-eating monsters with not even my sight intact. I hadn't survived everything I had until now just to let it end this way.

"... Asmodeus let you wander off while bewitched by the siren calls," said Mammon. "You're still going to trust him after he failed you? Haven't you realized the mistake you've made? It's not too late to fix it. Choose me. That's all you have to do, witch. Sable."

I ignored the thrill of dread that needled down my spine when he said my name. No point dwelling on it anymore. "Even if I could terminate my contract with Lust, I don't know why you think anything will change for me. You'd force me to contract with you afterwards anyway, or you'll turn me into beef jerky on the spot. Then we would have the same exact problem all over again."

"I'm better than he is. Stronger. Faster. I wouldn't let anything hurt you."

"Has nothing to do with anything. Lust, you said I Commanded you to keep back, and that's how I wandered off, right?"

"You did."

"So if you and Mammon's positions were swapped, and I Commanded him to stay away from me, the same thing would have happened. Right?"

"Indeed."

"No!"

They responded at the same time. It was clear which Prince was the rational one, and which one was just being contrary. Except — it was the oddest thing, but Mammon sounded almost... helpless. Still furious, still dangerous, and I was as wary of him as ever because one swipe of his claws would turn me into a three-piece, but the sheer frustration he channeled in that single word threw me off-balance.

No!

I shouldn't feel bad for him. And I didn't. But I didn't know what to name the uneasy twisting in my stomach when he vented that fierce denial — and nothing more, because there was nothing more he could do. Or nothing he would do, because despite his rage, he was still unwilling to break his tenuous fixation on me.

That was more unsettling than anything else. Because of his vendetta against Lust, he had put me on a pedestal, making me his sole object, the only reason he tolerated this impossible alliance. Because of his grudge against his covenant brother over things centuries older than I was, Mammon let me render him helpless.

And I had no idea what to do about it.

Except keep going, blindly groping, and hoping it lasted.

"Just... forget it," I said finally. My voice was so quiet it was only a little louder than the rain still falling hard around us. "I don't even really understand what just happened, my head hurts, and I'm trying to figure out how long I have left before I go insane for good. I want to get off this island. It doesn't matter how well either of you protect my body when it's my mind that's in danger. None of this would have happened in the first place if they didn't get in my head. So my time is running out. Okay? If I'm such valuable prey that you're going to waste time and energy fighting Lust about it, then be efficient. Be sensible. Both of you. Keep me alive and sane, which you can't do if I stay here, no matter how strong either of you are."

***

Lust explained it again when he took me back to the cave with Mammon trailing silently behind. Unable to hear the particular siren calls that they used to hunt, he had been taken unawares when I opened my eyes, looked him dead-on, and Commanded him to stay completely motionless and let me go. He hadn't known what was wrong at first. I had appeared completely in control of myself, utterly alert, and even though he had thought it strange that I was heading out into the fierce storm, I had a tendency to do unpredictable things. Leaving him in the dark about this was no surprise, either, considering that I had been upset with him. After I abruptly awoke, he had assumed I was finally rejuvenated enough to take my frustrations out on him at last.

Only when he glimpsed a dark pair of wings emerge from down the slope did he realize what was happening. With my life in danger, his obligation to protect me overpowered even the ironclad rule of my Command, though it still took long enough to imperil me unthinkably.

My will was so powerful, Lust explained, that it almost cost me my life.

Great. What a wonderful silver lining. Such joy to brighten my day.

"They're not calling now, are they?" Mammon asked when silence fell. "Can you hear them?"

The sirens, he meant. "Well... yes, but they're far away. Except I can hear them really clearly for some reason, even though they're not close."

He cursed. "The spell you cast pushed them away, but it won't last. You're even more drained than before, you can't do it again."

"I still don't understand that. I keep telling you both, I can't use magic."

"Surely you must believe it now, love. You did it right in front of me. Though... it was my strength you drew on to do so."

"What do you mean?"

"I would guess you don't have access to your innate well of magic yet. Your body knows how to manipulate it, but it cannot reach it to do so. You reached through our bond to use mine instead... but it being an impure conversion of energy, I'm afraid it may have taken a steep toll on you."

I didn't bother asking how all of that was possible in the first place. "How steep are we talking."

"We'll find out soon enough, I suspect. Magic always demands its toll. Though..."

He paused, and when I waited for him to continue, he aborted the thought halfway and changed course. "Never mind," he said swiftly. "It's nothing to fuss over. You need more rest, Sable. Come."

"No, thanks."

"The robes are wet. Without my heat, you'll be cold."

"I'll be fine," I said, but even as I said the words, a shiver fought to work its way under my skin. "... All right, I'll get closer. But not too close. I need space to breathe, okay. Seriously."

To my surprise, Mammon's voice emerged from my other side when Lust settled against the wall on my left. For someone who'd been sulking so hard for the past ten minutes, he got over it fast, didn't he?

"I'll be more useful than Asmodeus," he said shortly. "If he's bound by your Command, then he can't stop you if you give the order, if it happens again. But I can."

"Now that's reasonable. I appreciate the help."

For once, though I didn't know if it was because he agreed or solely to preserve the fragile peace, Lust remained silent.