As Cold as the Night (Book 1)

Chapter 18

Chapter 18
"Basura"

"So you still remember me," matabang na sabi ni Carmi nang tawagan ko siya.

"Carmi..."

"I thought you're too busy with your new found friends." Umismid pa siya.

"Don't be mad. Abala ka rin naman, eh."

"Fine." She rolled her eyes at me.

It's a hell week for me, magmula noong kumalat ang tungkol sa palpak kong confession. I made it until the weekend, thankfully. Hindi ko na sana gustong pumasok. With all the teasing and taunting that I get, ang hirap hirap ng pumasok nang walang nakakapansin sa'kin.

If it's not for Tita Dennis hindi na talaga ako papasok or at least I will be absent for sometime. Kung hindi kasi ako papasok siguradong magtataka si Tita. Mag-aalala iyon at iisiping may problema. Kung sana puwede na akong umalis dito at lumipat na lang. Iyon naman dapat ang unang plano. Lumihis lang... at napasama pa.

"So?" she probed, may pagsusungit pa rin sa boses.

"I did something..." Huminga ako ng malalim. Buong linggo akong tahimik at pinakaisip isip ang pagkakamali ko. Sila Eunnie, they tried to talk to me, pero hindi ko magawang magsabi. Tuloy, I was silent while trying to go on each day.

"May kasalanan ka?" Now she's all ears.

"Hindi naman..."

"Let me guess, this has something to do with Ham?"

I bit my bottom lip and nodded.

"Oh?"

"Kasi, umamin ako sa kanya noong nakaraan."

Isang buntonghininga ulit. Nag-iinit ang tainga ko. Hindi mawalawala sa isip ko ang eksaktong eksena.

"And then what?"

"I-I made a mistake..." I groaned and dropped my back on the soft mattress.

"Ano nga?" She was impatient. "What was his reaction?"

Inangat ko ang iPad ko para makita niya ulit ako. Nakatapat sa mukha ko ang front camera.

"Namali ako. Hindi pala si Ham iyong kausap ko."

I saw how her forehead creased. May naguguluhan at nagtatanong siyang tingin.

"How? What do you mean?"

Umahon ako at bumalik sa pagkakaupo. Inayos ko ang pagkakahawak sa iPad.

"It was after their game. Pumasok ako ng shower room nang hindi nag-iisip ng mabuti o tiningnan man lang muna ang paligid. I confessed directly, dala na rin ng matinding kaba..."

Kitang kita sa itsura niya ang pagiging interesado pa. Mataman siyang nakatingin sa'kin, naghihintay na matapos ang buong kuwento bago magsalita.

"I thought we were alone... I-iyon pala may ibang tao. At ibang tao nga iyong nasabihan ko. But Ham heard it, too... 'Yon..."

"What the fuck, Polka?"

"And it didn't just end there. Noong Monday, alam na yata ng buong school. Someone spread it tapos may video pa."

"What the actual fuck! Shit!"

Ngumuso ako nakahinga na rin na nasabi ko na lahat lahat.

"Polka, I know you're reckless and all that... but this... I dunno." She shook her head. "Hindi ko alam, tatawa ba ako o maaawa muna sa'yo? Damn!"

"Carmi, I'm the laughing stock now. I don't know when it will subside."

She crossed her hands on her chest.