what I've become after you left (KnB character x reader) [Discontinued]

Star (Nijimura)

You are an introvert and shy girl, dreaming in your little wonderland about the perfect relationship, and having an issue to gather up your courage to confess to your long time crush Nijimura. It is actually a love at first sight; it started during the first year when you met him, you were delivering paper works to the basketball coach and saw how amazing Nijimura is. Yes he is a hot blooded man with terrifying aura around him, but there are more about him than just his bad traits. He is undoubtedly a caring person, strong, and also hard working.

You never thought of yourself as a pretty or attractive girl, if a dictionary could define you then you believe that the right word will be ordinary. You realized that Nijimura has a lot of fan girls, and they are all so pretty. You too tried to get close to him, but every single time you're about to move forward, you began to worry about the consequences. You began to assume the "what if" possibility; thus you didn't manage to make your step forward. You were too worried about all sort of things inside your head that you become completely invisible to him.

'there are lots of pretty girl out there... it's impossible for me to win his heart'

'if he knows that I'm always watching him, will he be disgust?'

'I'm a nobody compared to him... it'll be shameful for him to walk with me'

' What if... he is not the right one for me? I'm just a fool who chased someone that is not meant for me'

Ooh Lonely Night
Ooh I Wanna Be A Starlight
The countless stars are twinkling a lot
But it's hard for me to shine the brightest out of them

It was a rainy day and you stood in front of the gym. You were holding an umbrella on your right hand and your cellphone on your other hand. it was a habit of yours to see Nijimura during practice, every time you see him do his best, it makes your heart skip a beat. Because of the heavy rain, the coach dismiss the practice earlier, and you saw Nijimura coming close to the exit door. You were paralyzed, you could not move an inch and kept on staring at the floor. when Nijimura passed your side, you told yourself to get a grip and greet him properly, you shook your head and shut your eyes, but no words ever leave your mouth.

You just kept on staring the damp floor; Nijimura and the others were nowhere to be seen now, and you looked up at the gray skies while holding back your tears

Will those stars know how I feel?
Every night, I talk to myself
It's lonely, it feels empty, my heart feels void
I walk as I hold back tears

'If... only i have the courage to greet him....'

'If only i have the courage to be close to him'

Not long you decided to go home, you opened up the umbrella and start to walk. on your way back, you saw a familiar person, your long time crush... hand in hand with a girl from your class, they were  looking really happy; you on the other hand can only stare at them blankly. you dropped the umbrella; as the rain pouring hard on the city, so was your tears began to fall, soaking your cheeks and your heart.

'Why am i so afraid to lose someone who is not even mine from the start?'

If only you would go and have the courage to come close to him from the start, the girl who were laughing beside him now could be you.

---

hello guys, sorry for the short story, but this one is actually dedicated to those who cannot express their feeling very well. I know that it takes courage to make the first step on every decisions and events in life, but please be aware that if you keep on lingering on the same spot and keep on repeating the 'what if' scenario, you will not go anywhere, and you will miss every opportunity and possibility in life, chance only come once in a life time, so make the best out of it, and remember you control your own life, if you don't step up for things that you what, step up for your self then who will? :3 happy reading everyone ^^