Threads of Tapestry

The Reason Why - Part 5

THE REASON WHY

Part 5

"Let me help you, Wendy,"
 
The guy came out behind me and got some books I was carrying before I could even tell him I could manage. Medyo mabigat nga ang buhat ko, pero kaya ko naman.
 
Isa pa, ginusto ko naman dahil ako ang nagsabi sa Librarian na gusto ko tumulong sa pagkuha ng mga bagong dating na libro.
 
I volunteered to help organize them on the shelves, too.
 
"Ako na, Fred," puna ko nang pati sa pag-aayos ay tinutulungan niya ako. Mabuti nalang maaga pa at walang pang tao dito sa library dahil baka pagtsimisan na naman ako.

And worse, baka atakihin na naman ako ni Mica. Bulag pa naman 'yong bitch na 'yon. It's the guy that he likes who keeps following me like a dog. Ilang beses ko na sinabing, hindi ko kailangan ng lalandi sa akin!
 
Hindi niya ba naiintindihan 'yon?

"Look, I'm being gentleman here, hmm?" nakangiting wika nito, halatang nanlalandi.

Humigpit ang hawak ko sa isang libro bago umikot ang mata sa harap ng shelf. "I am an independent woman, so please—"
 
"You translated it in a different language, Wendy." tawa niya pa. "Gusto ko lang mapadali ang trabaho mo."
 
I gave him a side-eye.

"Are you literally hitting on me?" humarap ako sa kaniya. My eyebrows turned into one while I was looking at him.
 
His lips rose, almost reaching his ears. "Oh shit, I really like sensitive Wendy." Napayuko pa siya bago muling inaangat ang tingin sa akin. "But yeah—Wendy, I like you—"

"But you know I have a boyfriend, Fred! You know him!" I cut him off because that's the truth. "And I love him so much. I'm already his, so please—stop whatever you are doing. If this is some sort of prank, stop it! Hindi nakakatuwa!"

Okay, I know he's serious. I've known him for a year now, and I appreciate him liking me, but I don't need it. I already have someone in my life, I already have Cristan. I don't want to waste his time on me.
 
God, there's Mica! Mica likes her!

Agad na pumait ang kaniyang ekspresyon nang matapos ako magsalita.

"Wendy, I know...and I respect that. But, but I don't understand it either. Hindi ko din alam kung bakit hindi ko magawang lumayo." he winced. "We've been friends for a year now, and I know that. I insanely know that."
 
"Yeah, Fred, we're friends. Can we just stay like that?" I said, trying to convince him to stop.
 
But you know, if there's one thing about Fred that I hate the most, it's his stubbornness. I told him a hundred times. Sinabi ko na sa kaniya na may gusto si Mica at may boyfriend ako, but he always replies,
 
"Okay, okay, I get it, Wendy. But do I like her? Not. And do I want you to break up with your boyfriend? Well, it's something I can't control. I just can't help it, Wend. I want to be there when he can't for you."

Stupid. He's not pushing me to break up with my boyfriend, but I know deep inside that he's wishing for it. And I hate it.
 
"If you won't stop, Fred, I'm sorry, it's hard but I'm willing to lose our friendship." Well, I don't mean them, but I do want him to stop hoping for me.
 
"They're just words, Wendy, right? I can still be there for you, right?"

I just rolled my eyes at him, shook my head, and continued doing my work. Mabuti nalang at may tumawag sa kaniya bago pa man siya muling makapagsalita.
 
"No, I'm a bit busy, Mica."
 
Oh God, why is he like that? Can't he just like her instead? Honestly, wala naman kasing masyadong problema kay Mica. Sa akin lang naman siya sobrang maldita at bitter. I'm her problem, and she's my problem, too.

Kung pwede ko lang sabihin sa kaniya na kaniyang-kaniya na si Fred dahil may boyfriend ako, e! At saka hindi ba dapat nga sinusuportahan niya kami dahil si Fred naman ang gusto niya? Or ayaw niya lang talaga akong maging masaya habang siya nagpupumilit sa taong hindi naman siya gusto.
 
"No, I won't. You see, he'll fall in love with me without your help—you don't need to avoid him. Sooner, he'll see you're not worth it."
 
I expected that response from her, but it still hurts me. Lagi na niya na lang pinapamukha sa akin na wala akong kwenta. Na lagi siyang mas better sa akin.