Fuck. That grey puff of smoke follows him everywhere. The scent of cigarettes sticks everywhere, and it always reminds me of him.
But it's not him.
I haven't seen him in six years, but a simple puff of smoke on the London streets takes me back to t...
For the entire two years we have been apart, I was never with another woman, or any person for that matter. She was all I wanted, no one else would ever be what she is or have the effect she does on me. For the first time in a long time for me, my head was clear and entirely set on what I wanted. The thought of a future with anyone else never even crossed my mind. So I sent Luna all these letters that I had poured my heart out into.
I never got a letter back from her.
I told myself her replies might've just gotten lost in the mail or maybe she just mailed the letters to my flat in Manchester, but I never got any mail to my flat.
It really sucked at first, but I quickly came to the conclusion that she doesn't owe me a response. She is killing it at her new job, she doesn't have to make time for some ex-junkie rockstar piece of shit. I fucked up. Hell, I mean I could've easily just called or texted her as well rather than some handwritten snail mail, but I didn't.
However, there is one letter for me that I do know is around, and waiting for me in downtown London. I approach the storage center and head to my locker, plugging in the code as if I had done this just yesterday, not eight years ago. Inside the small locker lies a sole envelope. I reach in, taking out the white paper envelope, thick with a letter sitting inside. I trace the familiar handwriting on the front of the envelope delicately with my fingers. I've waited years to open this and see what's inside, but now that it's time I read the note, I feel sick. I tuck the letter into the breast pocket of my coat and head back to the hotel, this is something that I need to do in private.
The letter had yellowed from years in the storage locker, and the paper had wrinkled a bit as well, but I would recognize the handwriting from anywhere. I remember the confusion when I received this letter. It was around April 2018, almost nine months since I'd last seen Luna. I don't even know how he found me at all, but sure enough I pulled a package out of the mail, and it was from Arthur, Luna's father.
Inside the package were two envelopes. One was labeled in red ink, "open first!" I obliged and opened that letter first, setting the other aside. Inside was only a short two sentences that read:
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It's been years since I've gotten that letter, and I've finally decided it's time. There's nothing I want more in my life than to have Luna by my side. But, not just by my side. I want her to be my best friend, I want to be the first person she calls when she's got good news, I want to appreciate her and her amazing intelligence, everything I have ever wanted in life, she embodies. There's nothing I want to experience without her going through it with me.
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