Sonata of The Shattered | Book I

Begging

Clayton reached for her left hand and held it tight as he cried again and again. Never she saw him crying like this, not even in the past. This was her first and she wanted to let go of all of the burdens in her heart, so tears that suffocated her for the past sixteen years started to run down across her cheeks. She couldn't help but to cry... to cry from the overwhelming feelings she's in right now.

"Fransesca, I'm sorry that I couldn't be with you during those hard days. During those painful days. I'm sorry that I couldn't be there by your side during the pregnancy and the birth, during her younger days." the middle child of the Kingsley cried as he held her hand tight. Not wanting to let it go. Fransesca wiped her tears away with her right hand and looked up to hold back her tears.

"You don't need to apologize. It's me who's too selfish to even allow you to know about her presence and existence. I'm sorry for hurting you this way, Clayton. For keeping things away from you. I'm not ready to explain why. In fact, I wasn't ready for this as well. But I know, I can't just turn away from things around me; from the secrets and the facts. Christine started to ask me about her father's identity as well..." Fransesca paused. "Then I realized, sooner or later, ready or not, this moment shall come."

She smiled at him slightly.

"Now that you know that Christine is your daughter, I only ask you for one thing. I'm not ready to talk about this to Christine. I'm not ready to tell her everything about you and us in the past, so please act as if you don't know her."

Fransesca felt her heart aching so badly after she said the words. Deep inside, she wanted to let them both know each other as father and daughter, but she's not ready for the big secret that she needed to tell Christine about. It was never easy for her to cope with this matter for the past sixteen years.

"I heard... about you and your father. You were kicked out from your own family. You were all alone and worked from day to night to provide Christine all that she needed. You put everything that you have away just for her and I wasn't even there to help you when I actually could." the fifteen years older than her asked between his cries, in which Fransesca responded with a sigh.

"I decided to do so. I choose my own path in life. Perhaps, that's what has been fated for me. My destiny. It's nothing to be talked about nor to apologize for. I'm happy and content with all that I have today. I have Christine and I feel enough, Clayton."

He looked into her eyes and wiped her tears away as he carefully proposed to her his wishes. "So please allow me to become her father, Fransesca. Though you refused to let her know me as a father now, let me be one. Let me do and take my part, to at least help with her financial matters. Everything that you need and she needs." he begged.

Clayton quickly took out his wallet and handed her his credit card, in which Fransesca quickly returned to his hand. "No, Clay. You don't need to. You don't need to do this." Fransesca refused. But, the man insisted until Fransesca stopped refusing him. "Please, please accept this from me. To pay for all the years when I'm not by your side and her side. To pay for all the sacrifices that you did for me; for my little angel yet I'm here, sacrificing nothing but regrets."

"Use it as you wish. Use the card for everything you need and want to buy. It's not that I'm repaying and valuing your sacrifices with money, but I wanted to take my part in Christine's life. To do what I can do for both of you. Yes, yes I do love you. I love you still. But this card is for you to use, as her mother. As someone I'm grateful to have."

Fransesca sighed. She put the card on the table, next to the cups and nodded thrice. "Okay, Clayton. I'll only use it for Fransesca needs. For her tuition fees and things she wanted. I'm okay and I don't need it." Fransesca replied as she wiped her tears away again, this time with a tissue on her hand. Her eyes as well as his were swelling red, from all the crying and the conversation they had.

The secrets finally unravel, when she's not even ready to say or cope with any of it.

"You need to go now. Christine will be home soon and I don't want her to see us like this." she told him as she peeked at the wall clock. Clayton also took out a card and gave it to her, putting it on top of the card at the table. "My number. Tell me if you need anything. Tell me everything about Christine. Give me daily updates on her. Can I?"

Fransesca nodded though her heart told her not to. She just couldn't help but to nod. No matter what happened between them both, Clayton is her daughter's father. Like it or not, that's the truth. Clayton took a sip on the warm tea and stood up. He walked out from the apartment unit after and somehow his heart felt much better, the same goes to Fransesca as well.

The two finally talked about the matter together and found their peace in the end. The peace they've always been looking for, away from those secrets Fransesca hid from him; from everyone.

to be continued.