Sonata of The Shattered | Book I

My Love, My Valentine

1 May 2007

Nobody said to her that giving birth to a child was something easy. Nobody told her that giving birth to a child would guarantee her a happy life full of hope. No, nobody told her anything; about what to prepare and what to expect as a mother. She never expected herself at the first place to be a mother yet here she was.

Here on the bed, she screamed her lungs out. Eyes full of tears from the pain that she felt. It struck her from head to toe, as if the grim ripper was there to pull her soul out of her body. It was something she never felt before and never wanted to feel for sure, as the pain was unbearable. Something that would kill a person instantly, if she could say it that way.

Nine months ago, she never thought that her life would turn upside down from two red lines on a test kit. A pregnancy test kit, to be exact. This wasn't something she imagined would happen in her life pretty quick and pretty lonely as well, as she went through all the hardships by herself. Nobody came nor put some care for her during her hardest time carrying another human being inside her.

"You're doing great, mama. Try to push harder, okay?"

The midwife asked her, giving her some support during this hard time or perhaps... to encourage her so the baby could be born soon. As giving birth gave more stress to the baby than the mother themselves, this thing was a hard journey for both. A new start for the baby and the mother herself in this world.

Natural birth causes a lot of pain as the mother pushes the baby out without any anesthetic. Fransesca asked her doctor and midwife for a surgery instead, but they told her that it's too late to decide for one as the baby's head could already be seen down there when she came to the hospital, crying, after her water broke several minutes before in the university's bathroom.

Thanks to her friends: Rachel, Naira, and Estelle, she could be found as quickly as possible before being sent to the hospital. Rachel was waiting outside while the other two couldn't go with her as work still awaits them back in the university. But they promised her that they'll be there as soon as they finish their lectures and meetings.

"Aaaargh—!" she screamed out loud. Inside, she felt like her life was at stake and it was true, actually. That all mothers in labor would be at the brink of life and death. That their life also depends on the baby itself after their own strength and condition.

Her eyes were blurry as it started to see some black spots here and there. She thought that she would blacked out soon after so she pushed harder, again and again, though the pain was too much for her to handle at this point. But again, she wanted everything to cease as soon as possible; the pain, to be specific. She wanted the pain to leave her body as soon as possible.

Both of her hands were being held by two nurses, who tried to help her during this child birth. Her teeth greeted as she tried to push the baby out down there and suppressed the screams that could slip out from her lips at any moment, if she wanted to. But then, she knew screaming would made her looks like a crazy woman and it would do nothing to her at all.

"Mama, are you here?"

She nodded her head as she tried to respond to the doctor's question in between the pain that struck her for hours already. "Okay, we need you to give the baby a very big push. A final push that could bring her out, okay? I know it's painful for you, but the baby is also in stress at the moment." she told her and Fransesca tried to collect her energy to do so.

One last time. One last push and everything will be done.

Fransesca took a deep breath before she screamed out loud, this time ignoring what good it brought to her, and pushed so hard as she felt the urge to do so seconds later. Then, she could hear the baby's cry, so loud that it filled the empty space of the room.

Tears fell from her eyes, down to the cheeks.

She's now a mother to a beautiful angel she gave birth to.

"Mama, you just gave birth to a beautiful daughter. We've cut the umbilical cord and are going to clean her up and check on her first before we give her to you, okay?" the midwife told her with a smile on her face. Knowing nothing about the procedure, Fransesca could only nod her head weakly. Letting the doctor do what she needed to do down there. Yes, it's painful... the stitches that the woman did down there in which she couldn't see but could feel.

Her heart raced as she saw a glimpse of the baby she just gave birth to minutes ago. It was a hard and a painful one, but her cries wiped all of it away as if she never felt it. When a nurse carefully handed her daughter, Fransesca became super careful. She doesn't want to hurt the little angel in any ways, though she knew that far before her birth, she gave her a painful life already.

"Have you prepared a name for her, mama?" asked the midwife, trying to ease the uneasy feelings in Fransesca's heart away. Fransesca gazed lovingly to her daughter and gently caressed her cheek, which calmed the little one down from her loud cry. "I have. I have a name prepared already and I know that someone would love to hear it one day, if he had the chance to do so," she replied.

"Catharina Christine Clementine. I named you from three actresses which someone very special in your life adores so much. If that someone had the chance to know your presence one day in the future, then that someone must've been very delighted!"

"That's a beautiful name. Do you have any idea what her nickname will be?" the midwife asked her again.

Fransesca's eyes couldn't stop looking at the beautiful creature in her hands. A tiny, beautiful and wonderful baby she'll spend her whole life with. There were so many nicknames running around her head but one came out again and again.

"Cathrine or Christine, but I'm going to call her... my love and my valentine."

to be continued.