Little Lies

19. Endless Void Of Silence

By the end of the day, I'm absolutely exhausted. Leon made me go through all of his files and paperwork and convert them to pdf's, wanting me to get it all done by the end of the day. Of course he knows it's absolutely impossible. When I saw the filing room filled with hundreds of boxes, I knew he was setting me up for failure. I'll be lucky enough to get it done by the end of the month on top of all the other nefarious tasks he'll be asking me to do.

As well as that, I organised various lunches and meetings with clients. All at high end restaurants that charge hundreds for a single bottle of red wine. When I called them up and mentioned Leon's name, they instantly made a spot available, despite the waiting list being months. I guess when you're rich and high up in the world, you don't need to wait for things like normal people do. You get what you want when you want.

Packing up my bag and shoving all of my notebooks into the desk, I log out of the desktop and stand to leave. From the corner of my eye, I watch, making sure Leon doesn't come out of his office. I don't want him to catch me leaving and suddenly come up with something else he wants me to do. I already displeased him when escaping to lunch earlier, I can't imagine what he'll do if he sees me leaving.

It's six o'clock, which is the end of the work day, everyone else is leaving, so I should be able to as well. I've got thirty minutes until I need to get to where I'm going, and so if he catches me, I'm screwed.

Thankfully I get to the elevator and down to the ground floor with no issues, and leave the building feeling a little better about myself. I've made it through the hellish day of working for my greatest enemy, so I should be proud. Now I get to reap the benefits of good pay and free lunch.

Outside is cool, with a gentle breeze. I pull my jacket further around me, tugging my bag close. The streets are busy at this time of afternoon. Everyone is bustling to get home to their family or friends. Normally I'd be excited on a Thursday night, but since Rory canceled movie night, I fell slightly gloomy. I hope she doesn't forget about me with these new men in her life.

I'd understand though, if she did leave me behind. They're handsome, rich and can give her what she needs. All I can give her is friendship and love, and sometimes that isn't enough. The world is a materialistic place and love can only get you so far. Not to say Rory is materialistic, but I think she might deserve to have something special in her life.

Me, on the other hand. I deserve nothing more than what I've got. Which was enough. It still is, I think.

God, what is with me being so fucking emotional. I need to pull myself together before I get there. I'm not going to look like a mess for her.

I hurry my pace, turning down another busy street when I get an alert on my phone. Pulling it out, I'm not sure who to expect, yet I'm not surprised when I see Leon's contact name. I open the message and roll my eyes.

Leon: Pack your things, you're moving into your new place tonight. I'll send a car to pick you up from your house. Be ready at seven.

This man can't get enough of ordering me around. Honestly, does he have no shame?

Me: I can't. I have plans. I can do it tomorrow.

A few seconds pass as I watch the typing bubbles appear and then disappear.

Leon: That won't work. Cancel your plans, and be ready at seven.

I fight the urge to throw my phone at an oncoming car. He thinks the world revolves around him, and maybe it does. But I don't. I'm going to put this man in his place by the time I'm done working for him. Perhaps our fake relationship will be the perfect time to teach him some humility.

Me: I can't cancel, it's important. Like I said, I can do tomorrow. I have class, but am free afterwards.

Not even two seconds pass before his next text.

Leon: Are you going on a date? I didn't think this would need explaining to you, but I can spell it out. While you and I are engaged in this act, you are not to be seeing anyone else. If any journalists see you with another man, it will be worse for you than me.

Me: No. I'm not going on a date, but if I were, it would not matter. Our "relationship" hasn't even been released to the public yet, so what I do in my own time is none of your business.

I watch my screen eagerly for his next text until I'm thrown out of my head by the sound of a car honking and voices yelling. I look up from my phone to find I accidentally wandered onto the street, too involved in Leon's stupid text messages.

Not wanting to make more of a fool of myself, I turn it off and shove it down into my pocket. Leon can kiss my ass. I've got somewhere to be and I'm not going to change my plans because he suddenly wants me to. Sure I'm grateful for the accommodation, but there's no reason as to why he needs me to move in tonight. It's ridiculous.

I make it to the slightly dirty building with five minutes to spare. Perfect. Just enough time to fix myself up and look slightly presentable. It's more quiet in this part of the city, and as I step up the front door and inside, the sounds outside are just a whisper. This place is always so silent and it creeps the hell out of me. There should at least be some music playing. It's not like I can complain though, it's the best I can do.

Reception is empty, but I come here regularly enough to not need to sign in. They know me well enough. I walk through the familiar halls and up a single flight of stairs until I reach the room that I came here for.

Taking a deep breath, I turn the handle and step inside the cold room. It's not just cold temperature wise, but more so of life. The walls are a pale blue and it's dead silent. The only natural light comes from a small window in the corner of the room that you can barely see through.

In the centre of the room is a large hospital bed. Occupied.

I move towards the bed, hesitantly. Always hesitantly. "Hello." I say, but my voice is barely audible. Not that it needs to be. It's not like she can hear me.

She looks so fragile, always slightly smaller each time I see her. Hollow cheeks, pale complexion. Her hair splayed over her pillow and slightly knotted. I remember when it was silky smooth, and her beautiful blue eyes would look at the world with such wonder. That was a long time ago. I'm surprised I can remember anything from back then.

I take out a brush from my bag and move to begin combing through her curls. I'm gentle, making sure I don't tug harder than I need to. "Life's really hard at the moment." I try to fill the void with my words, but I know they fall on deaf ears. I keep talking anyway. "I was awful to Rory, and have been messing with a boy because I can. I don't know why I do these things. I know I shouldn't, and I know they hurt people. But I don't know how to stop."

I pull through a hard knot, quickly apologising. "And there's this man who is determined to make my life a living hell. I think it might be karma. But I guess these are fickle things to be complaining about." My vision begins to get blurry with unshed tears. I don't deserve to cry, so I suck them back inside.

I turn the old radio in the corner of the room on, hoping to block out that silence. An old country song plays, and I hum along to the slightly familiar tune. I fix up her blankets and add another, making sure she's not too cold, and give her face a wipe, doing some skin care like she's always loved. I remember back when she used to show me how to do it. I was clueless back then. Not anymore.

I stay beside her for another half hour, talking about life and reading a chapter from the book I've been reading her, until I realise it's getting dark out.

I bid her goodbye with a kiss on the forehead, and slip out of the room, as if I were never there in the first place. Reception is still empty when I leave.

I take the quick way home, wanting to just get into bed and watch some netflix before uni tomorrow. By the time I get to the house, there's barely anyone out and about, and everyone is in their homes, having dinner and getting comfortable.

Walking to the front door, all is well until I notice a figure from the corner of my eye.

I'm not fast enough to get through the door.