Lost || Claude De Alger Obelia

Seven

"Why did you dedicate your life for something that can be stripped off of you someday?"

As a teenager who was confident that you'll never be replaced no matter what, you didn't bother answering those in worry. Instead, you were confident with everything as someone who was tricked by your own parents ever since you were a child. People around you always gush about how lucky you are for having such generous parents and praise your hard work, but there are still a few people who'd ask you nonsense.

And as a naive little girl back then, you told them your answers without knowing what the future had planned for you.

"I was born to rule this land, no sibling of mine will ever reach my level someday. Mother and father adores me, they will never strip me off my title."

It made you want to laugh at the flashbacks you're having in the verge of death, your teenage self was definitely the boastful one who would always puff her chest out in pride with a smug smile. A girl who was favored by her parents, a girl that was trained to rule a country. You were that person before, not until your brother's coronation and the announcement of you not being the heir anymore.

What happened to you in the present time was definitely torture, even if you love your brother. He was still one of the reason why you're suffering, your parents are the number one reason for it.

Who the hell would ever throw someone's life just like that when you're family?

Oh, such a foolish thought.

"Why don't you study more instead of going out with the other kids?"

That's your mother's voice, her stern tone made you a bit uneasy. Was this what you felt all along whenever she talks to you in rare occasions?

Maybe

"I'm sorry mother, I'll make sure to take extra times in studying politics and magic! Please don't lose your love for me."

Now that you think about it, your mother never really gave you the love and attention you wanted as a child. Though she would visit you in your chambers or training, it was only to check if you're doing what you were supposed to. And that was to act as a deserving ruler for the empire.

Even your mother wasn't sure if you'll be able to handle it, you were a girl after all. No woman is suitable to inherit the Imperial throne, they were only made to be the Emperor's support.

Such a pain, I wish I knew it sooner.

Women are just designs that produces heir for men, women are just designs that can be a bit useful to men for their daily needs. That's what they were thinking, that's what your mother was thinking about you. Or maybe, she didn't want you to inherit the throne because she was jealous?

Now that you think of it, your mother was also stripped off from her position as a heiress because a son was born. Your uncle was the one who ruled the kingdom your mother was from, and just by reminiscing her story. You couldn't help but feel a tied knot in your stomach.

Shouldn't she be the one to help you about it as someone who experienced getting stripped off over something that meant a lot for someone? Shouldn't she be the one defending you from your father so that you'll have your freedom and position safe?

Why wasn't she helping you?

"Why are you letting your mother say things like that?"

Your younger self couldn't really understand that what your mother was doing wasn't exactly what loving mothers act, she was clearly the opposite. But as someone who isn't exposed to genuine love, you didn't knew that her commenting about your talent and skills were laced with ill intent. You didn't realize that she was secretly bitter of how fast you were at doing what they wanted.

You never complained when they were the ones who would ask favors, you never complained when they think that what you were doing wasn't enough for them, you never complained when they blame you for things that weren't your fault in the first place. And that was the reason why your mother was irritated, that was one of the reason why she hated you.

You're a threat to her.

Her own daughter.

"Love is something that you should work hard on little child, as I am your father. You must prove to me that you are worthy of my time and affection, I cannot waste it on someone who will not be of use."

And there, you did it. You worked hard enough to gain your father's approval, you wanted validation from him. You want him to praise you for doing the things they wanted you to do, yet no one seemed to care about it that much.

Especially your father.

Growing up until that shattering day did you realize that they only chose you to fill the throne of a heir just in case they couldn't produce another one after yours, you realized that they never cared about what you felt.

Even your own freedom of speech and opinion was thrown out of the window when they decided to announce your loss of position, also when they introduced you to Claude.

What they did was something that was unforgivable to you, they were the reason why you lost your life.

And now, you're literally going to lose it as your body couldn't handle the pain and loss of mana.

I'm doomed.

I guess I'll have to pray that my next life won't be as stupid and harsh like this one.

"Her highness [First Name]! The princess! I found her!"