Into The Woods He Sang

Chapter 5: Dreams With Purpose

In this dreamscape, I could feel my body moving outside of it, opening my eyes to see a familiar woman with her hand extended and holding my face. The world was spinning, and the face of the mysterious lady was blurred as my adrenaline left more blood-staining fur and arms. All I heard were panicked voices all muffled yet loud, words incoherent to my dizzy head. This lady... She looked with a faded and aged blood-stained smile... That smile... I've seen this... Wait..! I know this..! I lived this! Before I could reach towards her, trying to grab for her red-stained cream-colored dress with a bullet wound and stained from blood, I seemed to wake up, all of it fading to a blur of people with worried faces, all talking at once, leaving me incapable of understanding the jumbled mess they each blurted out.
As I attempt to understand what was going on I saw Amanda hugging me, "You idiot! You shouldn't head out when injured like this! It could have gotten infected when it tore again!"
I barely mutter a "What?..." as she told the other people around us to leave. I watch as she held my face with tears and frustration straining against her glorious face and eyes. What happened? I... Didn't I just faint?...
My thoughts got cut off by a slap to the face, eyes widening as I was fully awake now. What the hell was that about!? She cuts me off before I could question it, "You had me worried sick! You just disappeared and Abigale was being a bitch as usual... Your father was being the usual manipulative jerk... I had no clue where you disappeared to!"
"A-Amanda... I'm sorry... I needed air and went further than intended... I just... Needed to breathe....", I mutter under my breath.
Oh she is so lucky I needed that snap to reality or I would have slapped back. But... I suppose I was letting things... Get out of hand again... She sighed, caressing my face, "It's fine... But... What happened Mason?..."
Of course... The question arises... Where was the wound from... How did it worsen... And why had I hidden it... Such a lovely... Mess... I groaned, recalling my annoyance with father... The argument with Abigale... Running off to be alone... For one second! All I needed... Was a second without eyes looking at me expectantly...
I frowned at her, "The usual nonsense people have been causing... Nothing new..."
She huffed in frustration, "Some challenger making you maim your hand? How did this happen?"
She pointed to my hand as she mentioned such. And that... Will be another lecture and a half... All while I try to avoid prying eyes and unwanted listeners... I reluctantly raised a hand, "I know you want answers... You need them for your contentment... But... I can't speak of it as there are listeners mere inches away... Can I... Show you alone?..."
She sighed, visibly relaxing, "Fine Mason... I'll give you that at the least..."
I smile, giving a faint "Thank you" in response. She nods, still agitated by my behavior. I suppose her anger is completely reasonable if a bit provoking. I follow her to the door, as I suspected, several young and old members having to step back as they listened for gossip. Great... More rumors to spread lies about me... That will be fun as my patience seemed to wilt like a rose in decay. In my annoyance, I glare at those that attempt to follow, Amanda also warning them to leave us be. I thanked her as I led her into my living quarters.
When we entered the room I was again greeted by the bleak arrangement, blood now dried from where I punched the mirror. I heard her faintly gasp from the display of my mental distress, "Great goodness!... It... Took more than realized with the new... Circumstances... Hadn't it?..."
I nod, closing the door and again as before, plopping onto the bed, sighing as I still had cleaning to do from my mess. She kneeled next to me in worried sorrow, frowning in evidential pity. The last thing I wished for was to be pitied... Not like I've broken down this one time alone... I've had many cold nights like this one... Though not as severe.
"Oh, sweet Mason... What have they done to give you such agonizing torment?...", she softly muttered, honey still lacing every word that dripped from her kissable maw.
I felt near tears at that simple question... What have they done?... Why should I care?... Where do all of these issues bloom from and how may I be fortunate enough to be rid of them at last?... I sighed, taking a deep breath... Three... Four... Five... "I've been... like this longer than I could possibly recall... It's just how I am... A beast in a cage... As all others trapped here out of the fear of daylight... Could you truly blame me for the cracks?..."
"Mason- I-"
I again cut her off, tears and rage now unveiling on my distressed face, "I have been like this... And forced to follow orders... For the past Ten Years, Amanda... My mother took what little positivity I had with her at her loss, having been a guide back to light... Keeping me and Father in line... But now... He uses her as a mere weapon against me in the name! I try to do what the pack requires! Really! But... It's all for nothing! He continues clawing for more to brake us all down and use us! Then that fool Abigale... Abigale Abigale Abigale... She couldn't face criticism to save her whole family from their downfall! It's pitiful that even I seem to stoop as being seen as nothing but a future mimick of my father when I hate the orders he enforces! Really... Why care if I faint off mere blood?..."
She seemed stunned at my outburst... That's when it hit me... Have... Have I pushed too far?... Am... Am I merely submitting as the tool my father wished?... I felt a hesitant hand wipe away my nonstop steam of tears, weeping further as it was Amanda... She had her own tears and a faint smile, "You're not him... And never will be... You are nothing like your father... And despite never meeting your mother... I'm sure she continues to watch you grow..."
I gave weak smile to her reply, feeling relieved of all the pain I once stored as my body relaxed at last after years of stress and pain... We held each other in a comforting embrace, something that felt so... Unfamiliar yet like I'd done it dozens of times over... More tears seemed to form in my eyes as I cling to her, wishing to hold onto this small moment, this sweet breath, this sweet song I have humming in my subconscious.
I felt in this sad and weakened state truly venerable... But like... It would be ok... That all the pain will be handled... The nightmare is over at last... I smiled, my body relaxing again into blissful slumber. The comfort seemed to lull me into a gentle rest, ending in black venom that seems almost brightened after such small reassurance... Something so... Meaningless... Right? A mutter in the wind feeling like screams and cheers to go on... Like a crowd clapping for a renewed light... I smiled in a sleeping state feeling the touch of unknown soft lips unknown to who belonged to, brushing against my own in a sweet affectionate kiss.
Such... A pure loveliness... And with it, my mind slips to the blackened waters of sleep. As usual, I wake with the returned dread... Though... Seeming dulled by the released pains. I look, seeing my hand was bandaged still, the mirror replaced, and the door closed yet unlocked... It hadn't been dreamt... That all happened... But... Amanda! Oh god, I can only imagine how she views me now in my empty room, still untouched for most, save for the blood now cleaned and broken pieces now gone. I groan in displeasure, recalling those soft lips to mine as I was blind from exhaustion and tears, unknowing of who it belonged to... She wouldn't love such a beast as me... A mear mess pretending as sane... Who would believe such a fool as worthy?...
I wipe at my now strained eyes, and get on new clothing, continuing my cycle of rules and lectures... But... What is this I hear?... Such faint yells?... Voices enraged with the screams of agitation between females... Oh god, what happened as I rested?