That Little Space Between Never And Ever [completed]

♡ Authors note ♡

   When I started this story back in January 2021 it was partly to practice my writing skills, to put my creativity into something and to show my love for the beauty of Formula One. Apart from that it also was an important way for me to cope with my feelings, to clean out my head as best as possible and maybe it was even a cry for help. Even though I had weekly appointments with my therapist at the time, writing this story is what really felt like therapy.
   I want you to know that this story and its characters are fictional, but you also need to know that some of them are (partly) based on real life. You may already have guessed it, but Olivia is based on me. Her past isn't equal to mine, but some parts are. Her feelings on the other hand are almost completely the ones I felt. - Don't worry, the self harm part was fictional. - This is probably also the reason some of you thought I was good at writing and bringing over the emotions she felt in the story; it wasn't written by brain, it's written by heart.

   A friend of mine made me make a promise when I started working on this story; I wasn't allowed to make Olivia do better before I was doing better myself. I stick to this promise and like you just read in the last chapter, I made it! Over those past two years I really grew and now I feel better than I have ever felt before. I am grateful for this journey, for my therapist, for my family, for all the support and of course, I am grateful for the joy Formula One brought and brings into my life.
   Of course I get those flashbacks sometimes and every little fall back is so scary, but I make it out stronger you know. Sometimes I wonder what I would have been like as a person if certain life events didn't take place, if I didn't get those really bad trust issues, if I didn't lose my confidence, the joy... But the past can't be changed, the present and future are in my control so that's what I should focus on.
   I want to thank my two lovely and loving long distance best friends (everyone who says that online friendships aren't real suck) you did so much more for me than you will ever understand.
   Dearest Raghda; you are the Carlos to my Lando, you taught me how to use the stairs when all I could was being down. I love you! <3
   Dearest Lizzy; you are the love of my life, thank you so much for always being right by my side and for being the brightest light. I love you! <3

And then, thank YOU;
   Thank you for reading my story,
   Thank you for letting me feel like I'm good at what I do,
   Thank you for making me fall in love with writing,
   Thank you for supporting my journey,
   Thank you for making it this far!!

This may sound cheesy but without all of you I would have probably quit on this story and on writing in general, without all of you I wouldn't have made it this far.

   Please know that I'm always here for whatever you need! Story idea you want me to do something with? Send it to me! Anything you need to get off your chest? Message me! Just want a good laugh? I'm so in!
   Don't ever hold back from contacting me, here on Wattpad or on Instagram (@formula4life1), I only love to hear from you!

You're stronger than you think you are and it's honestly true that time heals everything, sometimes it's just a long time. 
Lots of love ♡