Those Little Moments (Hatake Kakashi)

26

The curry was almost done when Iruka finally arrived at Naruto's place. In a way, it was strange, I was really happy when he showed up. Part of me knew he'd stayed back for my sake, based on the way he'd been looking at Kakashi, and so there was a warmth filling me I hadn't really felt for him before. In a way, it reminded me of when I would hug Minato all those years ago, a feeling I hadn't even thought of in ages.

Iruka was surprised when I hugged him, but hugged back almost immediately, and I felt myself sinking into it, no tension remaining in my body even as I pulled away. 

Smiling gently, I ushered him in, ignoring the strange, sudden feeling that I was being watched. 

Dinner went as smoothly as it usually did. I constantly had to remind Naruto to have table manners. Naruto would then complain to Iruka who looked like he wanted to laugh as he told the loud boy to listen to me. When I wasn't needling him about his etiquette, Naruto was bragging, definitely exaggerating, about his feats during his most recent missions. 

I gave the appropriate reactions, chortling when he was being way too obvious about his exaggerations and praising him when he did things well. By now, he'd stopped blushing at my compliments, and it made me glad that Naruto was finally getting used to being told good things rather than just insults. It was sad that he never had before, but I felt good knowing I was changing that for him, that I was succeeding as an aunt.

When we finished eating, I kissed Naruto on the forehead, ruffling his hair, then left. Iruka, as usual, walked beside me until we parted ways, waving goodbye with a small smile.

Once I was alone, I breathed out a deep sigh, feeling a sudden exhaustion come over me. My limbs felt like lead, my eyelids were begging to close, and my lungs burned as if I'd run a marathon. I felt like sinking into a deep, warm hug, with no words but only comfort. As my mind tried to wander, to go over the day I'd had, I felt a headache forming in my attempt to avoid the emotions that came from the interaction with Kakashi and worry about Naruto.

I made my way to Kurenai's place, dragging my feet behind me, and, as I started to head toward the couch my best friend had been letting me crash on until my room at Naruto's was set up, I realized, no matter how tired I was, if I went to sleep now, I would lay awake overthinking the day for hours.

Turning a lamp on, I grabbed the book on the top of the pile Kurenai had given me. Reading the back, it seemed it was a 'coming-of-age' romance between a musician and an upcoming actress.

I leaned back in my couch/bed, starting on the first page. At first, I didn't understand the appeal, as the moment they met was rather uninspiring, and I found the second male lead to be a better partner for the girl, but then, the musician had to teach her how to sing, and there was that moment where everyone else was teasing her. He was the only one to support her instead of laughing, telling her pointers in a low voice.

There was a scene I couldn't stop smiling at, where he took her to a karaoke bar to teach her confidence, and when she was too nervous to go up by herself, he sang a duet with her. I decided in that moment, that sometime soon I should absolutely go to a karaoke bar. Even without a romantic moment like that, it seemed so fun, and was definitely one of the things I'd missed out on from my imprisoned youth.

The more I read, the more moments I felt had been stolen from me, and I started writing a list of things I wanted to do. Though at first, it felt like the chains were tightening around me, I realized I was free now, and instead decided to look forward to being able to do these things. After all, there was no point lamenting the past when I had plenty of future to make fun memories like the ones in my book.

I finished that book within two hours, and by then I already had a good number of things to do on my list.

- Go to a karaoke bar

- Dress up nicely for a date

- Bake cookies with friends

- Cuddle with someone (romantically, so Kure doesn't count)

- Have a real first kiss (by that I mean consensual and enjoyable)

- Have a double date with Kurenai (she would definitely be going with Asuma)

- Be serenaded (that scene was so cute!)

Suddenly excited about my new to-do list, I wanted to start reading the next book in the pile too, but when I realized how late it was, I decided to wrap up the list for now. As I turned the light off and wrapped my blanket around me, my mind was racing with thoughts of that book. Moments flashed in my brain. Instead of the main character, it was me whom the faceless musician was serenading. I could imagine arms wrapping around me and my heart fluttering the way they described in the book. 

I hugged my arms around myself, smiling so widely it almost felt like it was too big for my face. Every time I tried to calm myself down, I burst into giggles, this unfamiliar feeling too strong for me to quench it. 

For the first time, I really understood why I had enjoyed getting flowers from Guy so much. I knew enough about romance that his gifts always made me subconsciously realize I was being pursued romantically. In a way, I regretted that I didn't feel that way about him, but I was also glad I didn't, as it would've been too overwhelming to have romantic feelings about someone so quickly. Still, knowing I was worthy of romantic attention felt really good, and I wondered when I would feel stable enough to really be open to true romance.

For now, I would be more than happy getting all my romance from Kurenai's books, which definitely surpassed expectations.

Eventually, I passed into sleep with a tired smile on my face, and though my dreams weren't all happy, I had none I would consider nightmares, and I slept through the night easily.