Waters of Lethe, Book 2

10. Ignis Fatuus

Ryan shook his head in disbelief. "Come on, man. Stop with the bullshit-"

I grabbed his shirt collar and pulled him to me, getting in his face. "You want to know what bullshit is? The fact that anyone else-anyone else-could have received what she did. Anyone! It's bullshit that it could have been me-"

I felt a hand on my shoulder, pulling me away from a terrified Ryan. I turned to the person, almost decking whoever it was. When I saw that the person who had put their hand on my shoulder was Donnie, I stopped. My fist froze in the air, two inches from his jaw. He didn't have time to flinch.

He cut his eyes over to my fist, then shifted them back to me. He looked tired. I couldn't imagine everything that Audi had them doing within the last several days. Hopefully they had information that would be helpful.

Donnie gently moved my fist out of the way with the back of his hand. My hand fell to my side, the energy gone from it as well as the rest of my body.

"My office," Donnie told me. "Now."

I followed him through the crowd of people who had stopped to stare at my outburst. I avoided their gazes, but by the time we reached the hallway that led back to the lab and Donnie's office, I was ready to explode. I didn't care for the attention.

We walked into the office and Donnie shut the door behind me. "What is it exactly about Ryan that you don't like?" he asked as he sat behind his desk. "He's a nice guy. Couldn't hurt dirt. Funny, too. Reminds me of a clumsy dog..."

I took one of the chairs that sat in front of it, rubbing my face again. "I'm just a little on edge, alright?"

"No. I've watched you around him. I don't think you like him," he told me with an all-knowing smile, pointing a finger at me.

"I'm on edge."

"I don't blame you, kid. We all are, but you have way more reason to be."

I didn't know that everyone knew about El and I, how we'd come to feel about each other, but it couldn't have been that difficult to recognize. I still asked, "What do you mean by that?"

"You and El have been together for the better part of, what? Six months? Let's say six months. You're the only ones who can say you really understand what the other experiences, what the other feels. There's nothing more connective than the knowledge and comfort that comes with understanding someone and having them understand you."

"That's one way to put it," I told him.

"Plus, you love each other."

"That's another way to put it. How did-"

"We watch you more than you think, Jai."

I stared at him. "Not like, we have hidden cameras in your home watch, right?"

He laughed. "No, not that extreme. We value human rights here. Or try to, at least. We just notice, that's all. Look. We're a team here. No one is against anyone, and El is a sweet girl. She made friends here, Ryan being one of them. We all care about her, which makes it that more important to us all that we team up and drop the attitudes and find her. As much as I want to, you don't see me trying to rip Gomez and Tom limb from limb."

I nodded. I understood where he was coming from. "So is that it?"

He looked at his watch, raising his eyebrows at the time. "I guess so. It's time to begin."

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People were packed into the conference room, sitting in the chairs, standing along the walls. People I recognized, people I didn't. We were all here to discuss and figure out one thing, which gave me hope.