Every Memory Repeats

Chapter 22

"He did drown!" Lawrence said, standing up from his seat. His chest was tight, and he was confused. "My brother drowned! My mother said..." Lawrence looked at Vivian, who quickly stood up, and went back to refill her brandy.

John saw how agitated Lawrence was, and said, "The last thing I remember, is staring up through the water to see my brother reaching for me."

Lawrence felt dizzy, and he became choked up, "How do you know that? How could you know that?" Looking at his aunt, he said almost helplessly, "Vivian...Forrest died...he died..." But the look on her face made him wonder.

"We can do a DNA test if you'd like to," John told him. "Marlena said we probably should, and I'm still trying to put the pieces together myself. I don't know why, but my mother took me to New York. She gave me a new name, and she left me at a Catholic School. I never saw her again."

"No—No!" Lawrence said, feeling himself get lightheaded. Something was wrong with this story, because Forrest was supposed to be dead. Glancing at his aunt, who had been noticeably silent, Lawrence said, "What are you not telling me?"

Vivian sighed, "I really think we should get a DNA test before we even proceed with this enticing conversation, Lawrence. This is obviously a ploy to get his hands on the Alamain money."

John looked at Vivian, "This is not about money! This is about trying to find out who I am!"

Lawrence looked at John for a long time, and said to Vivian, "No. No...no one knows how Forrest died."

"Forrest drowning is common knowledge, Lawrence."

"But not how he drowned. Not the part about me reaching for him in the water..."

Vivian gave up, slouching onto the couch, with her brandy sloshing over the side of her cup, "What do you want to know?"

"What do you know?" John asked her suspiciously, sitting back down on the couch.

"You're mother was whore, Lawrence, you know that!" Vivian sighed.

"I don't know that! I do know that my father was an asshole! He treated her horribly! Did she have lovers? Yes, but I have always understood why. She was trapped in a loveless marriage at the age of eighteen...but she wasn't a whore, Vivian!"

"Fine. You're mother had companions...my brother found out that Forrest wasn't his child," Vivian said. "He was angry. You know that what he was like, when he was angry. He would make threats...none of which he would ever follow through on, but in his anger, he mentioned Forrest possibly having a riding accident. He said maybe then he wouldn't be forced to raise another man's child."

Lawrence began pacing the room, "My father threatened Forrest's life?"

Vivian scoffed, "He was simply angry. He never would have hurt the child!"

Marlena had been watching the byplay in the conversation, and said quietly, "How did this impact John? I'm not trying to be rude, but Lawrence believed his brother dead. How did John end up in New York?"

Vivian sighed, "I didn't find out until years later, that Philomena had ferried Forrest away to New York, and hidden him in a Catholic school. The boy was raised by priests. I wasn't surprised to find out he'd decided to be a priest."

"I was never ordained," John said. "Stefano took me before I was ordained."

Vivian was silent for a moment, "Philomena died when Lawrence was fifteen. I knew where Forrest was, after going through her records, but I left everything as it was. Forrest seemed to be thriving, and my brother...my brother would not have wanted the boy back. It would have been unkind to bring him back into such hostility. So I left him where he was. He seemed content. I checked with the priests periodically...until he disappeared. I called one day and he was gone. He'd disappeared in the night, and was never seen again."

Lawrence stared at Vivian as if he had never known her, "Why didn't you ever tell me this?"

"What good would it have done?"

"I blamed myself!" he roared. "I've spent my life blaming myself for the death of my brother, and he wasn't dead!" Looking over at John, Lawrence wondered if John Black really could be his brother. A DNA test would be the only way to know for sure. To John, he said, "I think you're right, we need a DNA test."

Marlena sighed, "I think that would be best."

Lawrence looked back towards Vivian, and said quietly, "If John is Forrest, he gets half of my mothers estate."

John immediately said, "I'm not here for money."

"If you're my brother...half of my mother's estate rightfully belongs to you."

John stood up, and nodded his head quickly, acknowledging what Lawrence said. Turning to Marlena, he held out his hand, helping her rise. Vivian watched them with interest, noting the affection they seemed to hold for each other, and the way their fingers laced together. If John Black was Forrest, he was rightfully entitled to half of Philomena's estate. As long as it didn't impact Vivian's financials, she didn't much care.

Lawrence stood in the foyer for several long moments after John and Marlena had left his home. His mind was a whirling mass of confusion. Something inside him, something strong, knew the truth of what John told him. Lawrence had spent years having nightmares and flashbacks of watching his brother scream, and flail in the water, as he sank to the bottom of the family pool. As much as Lawrence had disliked John Black, finding out that he could be his brother, was a relief, as it eased a sorrow he had lived with for nearly his whole life.

John sat outside in the car, and stared at the steering wheel. Marlena touched his arm softly, "Are you okay?"

"That went better than I expected," he said quietly. "I expected more resistance."

"I sensed that Lawrence has a lot of trauma surrounding his brothers death. Finding out that he'd lived...finding out that it could be you, it was as if a weight was lifted from him," she said.

"I felt that, too. I'm slowly getting my memories back, and Lawrence and I, from what I recall, we were quite close," John told her. He held her hand in his, and watched his thumb stroke over her palm.

"He's agreed to a DNA test. That's good, because he could be your half brother. He could be family," she said softly.

"Based on what Vivian said, I might never know who my father was...and I'm—I'm okay with that, Doc, because I feel good about today."

Smiling up at him, she said, "I feel good about it, too. Are you okay...finding out you're an Alamain?"

"I am," he said, kissing her softly. "Being an Alamain doesn't bother me. What brings me more peace is the fact that the pieces are coming together, and even if I can't remember my past...just knowing what happened to me will be enough."

"I think you're going to remember, John."

"I hope so...as long as I've got you, I'll take the rest as it comes."

Marlena glanced at the clock on the dashboard of John's car, and said softly, "I have a meeting with Mickey."

"Did you want to go alone?"

Marlena smiled at him, saying, "I should, but maybe afterwards..."

John got excited, "You took the whole day off?"

"I did," she told him. "So after I meet with Mickey, I could come by your apartment. I don't have to pick the twins up until later."

"Did you forget, Doc? It's Pizza Friday," John started the car, and pulled out of Lawrence's driveway. "Come by after you meet with Mickey, and then later we can pick up Eric and Sami together."

Smiling at John as if he were the sun and the moon in her sky, Marlena said, "I'd like that."