Super Trouper

christmas eve

"Give them a kiss from me, Merry Christmas," Frida said smiling.

Then, Frida went to the kitchen, Anna was preparing Christmas dinner with the help of Heléne and Lotta, while Hans and Peter contributed by preparing the drinks for the night, Benny dedicated himself to set the table and the rest of the Christmas decorations. "Smells delicious," she commented, going over to the stove and sniffing around.

"You should wait until everything is ready," Heléne warned.

"It's not fair," Frida complained but it was exactly the same thing she used to them when she was in charge of the kitchen. Then, Frida left completely ignoring Benny's presence in the dining room and went to the stairs back to her bedroom, although she wanted to be strong, everything that was happening affected her, especially since she didn't know when she would finally have peace.

In the comfort of her room, she was able to freely complain about the back pain that she was complaining about but that she did not want to discuss with anyone. She sat on the corner of the bed moaning and pressed her lips together. Either way she wanted to choose a dress and put on her best face for the celebration, she had already ruined enough. Just when she would lift a foot to continue complaining to herself, the bedroom door opened and of course only one person was already walking in like that, Benny.

Frida looked at him, he looked at her too, but none of them said a word and that certainly destroyed her. Benny went into the bathroom clearly ignoring her, then she closed her eyes and some tears came out wetting her cheeks, she already felt bad enough to have to face another pain. She got up from the bed feeling her spine break, but she had to do something for her own well-being. She first looked out the window, it was foggy, it had snowed a little outside and it was already dark, then she continued on her way to the bathroom, the door was still open and when she entered Benny was in his boxers in front of the mirror trimming his mustache, he looked at her through the mirror but at first he couldn't decipher her  intention. Frida leaned against the door, crossing her arms and waiting for him to pay attention to her.

Benny looked at her once more out of the corner of his eye and noticed that she wanted something from him, so he put the scissors on the sink and this time he turned to face her, showing attention. "We need to talk," Frida said as soon as she got his attention.

"I'm listening," he nodded, Frida felt very weak emotionally, so a lump formed in her throat, preventing her from being able to articulate clear words.

"I never wanted to have an abortion but you wouldn't understand," she finally said, her voice cracking and her gaze fixed on him. "My children are the most important thing to me and every decision I've made has been made with them in mind," she continued and frowned. "I regretted and condemned myself for having suggested the possibility of an abortion when I was stuck with Lotta and I continue to regret it every day that dawns because I am connected to this little girl and she is a part of me, but I do not believe that you have any right to claim on me," she made it clear to him as tears continued to well up in her eyes.

"I don't want to claim you and I don't even want to rule your body but I can't help it hurting me, especially finding out from a third party that it's not you," he pointed out, squeezing his hands.

"Benny, do you know me?" She questioned him. "I am your wife, do you know me or not? What things do you think I can do and what not?" She asked trembling as her eyes continued to produce tears. "What hurts me the most, of all this, is not even the physical pain, it is that right in this situation you claim that I ever thought about abortion and that I may be capable of intentionally committing an act like yesterday falling off the stairs, at this point in the game," she closed her eyes and shook her head, it sounded worse than in her head. Benny also shuddered when hearing those words, they sounded absurd but suddenly that was what he really wanted to understand.