New Angel H.S

16

HARRY STYLES

All day.

I've been here since the second she closed her eyes. I haven't kept my eyes off of her. If I'm not looking at her, the boys will be. She's not leaving any of our fucking sights.

I feel stressed and I don't even have a good reason as to why. It's as if there's a clock in my brain ticking, waiting for the love of my life to wake up. It's also almost peaceful, though. Knowing Hazel is there and is safe. Knowing that right now, there will be no more harm.

It's difficult to know what to do now. Should I wake her? Am I sitting too close? No one should have to question things like that with their own wife. I don't want to scare her, I don't think she could take anymore pain. It's hard to ingore every mark on her body when I was meant to be the one preventing said marks.

Not knowing what the fuck to do, I just wait.

I wait as her chest peacefully rises and falls. As my heart steadies, my eyes focuses on her. The sun makes her glow, making a subtle yet obvious tingle to appear in my stomach, one that hasn't been there for so long. I used to hate the feeling but it just makes me feel in love again.

I have wondered if she'd like waking up to Tee. I thought anything's better that what she's been going through. But something in me is telling me to wait. I feel like I'm going to fast. I don't want to lose her. I'm so fucking scared of loosing her.

I lean there, watching time go by with my elbows on my knees, listening to her soft breath.

And I feel so guilty.

"I'm so fucking sorry," I frown, I barley realise I'm saying anything out loud. My hands by my face, I lean my forehead against them and I feel my lip tremble, keeping in tears that have been lost for ages.

"I'm so fucking sorry Haze, but- but-" I rush to say, I whisper it to makes sure not to wake her. "You're okay this time baby. You are. I love you and you're okay. It's going to be okay." My voice breaks and I'm not sure who I'm trying to reassure: her or me.

"It's just you and me now, okay? You and me. Like it's going to be for the rest of our fucking lives, Hazel. You and me." I say and look to her, almost hoping for a response but the only thing I get is her chest rising and falling again.

"I'm so sorry." I say again and I look at her. "I love you so much baby." I whisper which makes her frown. She frowned.

"Hazel?" I say her name and she scrunches her face, as if she's waiting for a hit to wake her.

Ignore it, Harry.

My heart aching, my face lights up, she's awake. And she's alive. And she's breathing. She's not dead. "Haze, good morning Hazel." I say and shuffles to the edge of my seat. She stretches and opens her brown eyes.

She stares at me with almost no expression on her face. She looks between both of my eyes, I don't question it but I enjoy the peaceful moment because time can finally stop.

And she cries.

He arms reach for me, she wraps them around my neck, pulling me in, I get to smell her scent, one I don't recognise anymore. "Good morning Harry." Her voice breaks. But, it's her voice, so I smile.

"Don't cry, darling." I tell her, and hold the back of her head, weaving my fingers in her hair. I bring her head to my chest and I let us sit for a second, I feel each breath she takes.

She sniffs, so I pull her head back slightly, brushing one of her tears away with my thumb. She smiles at me as I focus on every last feature on her face. Her cheekbones are a lot more defined but she's still so recognisable. Her lips are still soft looking and plump. Her eyes are still as brown as I remember. The way her face sits, however, is so much different. It's unexplainable, as if she's just a shell. I have a strong feeling that the only way to get her back is with time and love. And that's if the Hazel I met will ever come back.

But I knew I couldn't stop loving you.

I move her smooth hair from her face and place a small kiss on her forehead. I then hold her jaw either side and she softly smiles, holding my wrists. "You hungry?" I ask her and she closes her eyes, nodding.

I get up from her and walk to the door and wait for her to catch up. "Harry?" She says and I turn, she's still sat on the sofa. I nod and she goes to speak but I can tell she can't get her words out.

"Anything, you can say anything, my love." I say to her and smile for reassurance.

She nods and looks into my eyes. "You've been sober?" She asks, my stomach trembles as she does.

I've been sober, yes. I haven't slit my writs, I haven't drunk, smoked. I've been sober. It's weird knowing that she knows- weirder, someone actually asked.

I look at her for a moment and smile. I really fucking appreciate her asking, she'll never get to know how much I do. "I've been sober." I say back and she smiles and arises from the green sofa.

I walk back up to her, taking her hand, her other hand is holding my arm. I look at her smiling- it's so fucking surreal having her back. I'm honestly waiting to wake up from a dream. Not an ounce of me was worried I would never have her back. I'd fucking let go of everything for her without a second thought. But it it's still so crazy having her back. I love her so fucking much and to have someone I love so much standing by my side again is so fucking surreal.

We walk down the large corridor to the open kitchen and she sits on the stool, the boys sat on the sofa behind us both.

Tee then jumps up at us, her whole demeanour lights up at the sight of her. "Tee." She smiles and runs her soft hands down her fur. I've always found hazel's hands to be look pampered but you can tell when they really are. I never really imagined her to have manicured nails. "Hello Tee." She giggles to herself.

I breathe a breath of fresh air. "What would you like, baby?" I ask her and she looks up at me, letting Tee go, but I know tee is probably right by Hazel's feet. Hazel leans on her elbows, one hand is on the surface, she's picking at something.

I look at her hand, fully aware that her black ribbon isn't tied around her wrist and that her ring is no where to be seen. I try my best to ignroe it, despite my ache in my chest.

"I don't know Harry Styles, suprise me." She smiles and my stomach bubbles as something very specific raids my mind.

Pancakes.

I smirk and nod. She rubs her eyes and I look up to the boys. They know exactly why I'm looking. I promised that we're not taking an eye off of her and I intend to keep it. Louis and Liam nod so I look back down to my Hazel.

I frown knowing I have to turn away.

But I do.

I always do.

I take the flour from the cupboard, then I find the last two eggs and grab the milk from the fridge. I hope to fuck I'm doing this right.

I take out a large bowl and I find myself picking at my lip. I stop myself by putting my hands on my hips. I'm not sure if theres an order to this. I'm proably going to fuck this up.

I add in some ingredients, I don't really know what I should do next, though, so I guess.

I'm so fucking worried about what's to come with me and Hazel. I know that I have her and she has me. I'm fucking infatuated with every inch of her, I'm not letting that go but I'm worried about the bounderies I now have I might overstep. I don't want to fucking hurt her, what ever happened hurt her is enough.

I don't know if she wants to sleep in the same bed, or if I can watch her get dressed. If I can shower with her. I don't fucking know.

Usually, I always know.

And know I'm just lost.

I know I'm not going to give up. She's my fucking life. I don't care, I'll fall in love with her again if I have too.

I don't care about the boundries I keep for her, I will do anything.

But, when you fall for someone and they drastically change, I suppose it's hard accepting the new normal.