Every Memory Repeats

Chapter 5

"Sami?" Roman asked. She looked up from where she sat, working on a school project, waiting for him to finish. "Can you put the syrup in the pantry?"

"We keep it in the refrigerator," she said, standing up, and walking towards him to take it.

"That makes it hard to pour. Put it in the pantry," he said with a sigh.

Sami needed him to know why they didn't put it in the pantry. "We have to keep it in the refrigerator, because when it's in the pantry we get ants. My daddy said—"

Marlena entered the doorway to the kitchen just as Roman's face turned red. "I'm your father, Sami! Just do as I say!" he finally burst out.

Sami looked up at him, with tears in her blue eyes, and exploded, screaming at him, "My Daddy doesn't yell at me! My Daddy doesn't make me feel stupid! I hate you! I hate you!" She threw the glass bottle of syrup across the kitchen, causing the deep brown glass to shatter when it hit the wall, and she ran from the kitchen sobbing.

"Samantha Gene Brady!" Roman roared. "Get back here, and clean up this fucking mess!"

"Roman!" Marlena yelled, coming into the kitchen with her arms full of groceries. "It doesn't matter how angry you are, we don't talk to our children like that!" She placed the bags on the counter, giving him a hard stare, and then she exited after Sami. 

She found Sami in her room, sobbing into her pillows. "Sami?" Marlena whispered. "Sami, honey?"

Her daughter looked up with swollen, red, tear filled eyes, and she said, "I hate him, Mama."

Marlena hesitated. Sami needed to retain her autonomy, and Marlena felt like she could tackle those intense emotions after Sami had calmed down. Smoothing her soft fingers over her daughters hair, and pulling her close, Marlena said gently, "Sami... tell me what happened from the beginning."

"He—he told me to put the syrup in the pantry, but—but we don't put it in the pantry, because we got ants once, and Daddy said, we keep it in the refrigerator now." Sami was struggling to calm herself down, so she could speak. "I tried to tell him, and he just yelled at me. He wouldn't even listen. He wouldn't listen... I—I tried to talk, and he wouldn't listen!"

"You didn't do anything wrong, Sami," Marlena told her gently. The twins were trying so hard, but Roman became angry at any reference to a past where John was a fixture in their lives. "I don't want you to think that you did."

"I feel like I—I don't know what I can say, and what I can't say... because he always gets mad at me... I just want him to go away... I want to go away..."

Roman's continued animosity towards John was making it difficult for everyone. He got angry when the twins mentioned anything related to John, and this was just another example. Marlena kissed Sami, "I love you. I love you so much."

Looking up at her mother, she whispered, "I broke the syrup. I'm sorry."

"Sometimes when we get angry... we throw things, but then we have to clean up our messes," Marlena told her.

"Do you throw things?"

Marlena smiled, remembering when she and John were married, and she'd tossed a whole chicken at him, "I have."

Sami's eyes got large, "What did you do?"

"I got angry at John once... and I threw a raw chicken at him."

Sami burst into laughter, "Your threw a dead chicken at my Daddy?"

Marlena paused before she said softly, "I did... and then I had to clean up my mess, just like I need you to come downstairs, and help me clean up your mess."

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Another day, and another hypnosis session for John. He was still unwilling to go to Lawrence with the memories he'd brought forward. Marlena scribbled furiously in her notebook, trying to keep track of what John was saying. "John, can you tell me more about your surroundings? What can you see?"

"It's dark. The air is... the air is brackish. I'm in a basement... it's like a dungeon," he said. "I'm... I'm tied down... on a table." His body jerked violently.

She leaned forward, watching him closely. "Who is with you? Are you alone ?"

John growled, low in his throat, "Stefano... Celeste... Rolf..." Marlena wrote down the names, only recognizing Stefano's. She was about to ask another question, when John screamed, "No!"

"John what's happening? Remember, this is just a memory," she said. "Stand outside of it, and watch it like a memory. Can you do that?"

His breathing was still elevated, but he told her in a husky voice, "Yes."

Unable to stop herself, she reached out and smoothed his dark hair back from his sweaty forehead. Watching him relive these traumas was so hard on her, and yet she knew he needed closure. "Can you tell me what's happening?"

His voice was rough. "I'm being tattooed. Stefano said he owns me now. I've been marked with his crest, and I belong to him..."

"Do you know where you are? Where Stefano might be holding you?" she asked.

John whispered barely loud enough for her to hear, "Maison Blanche." His body shuddered again, and Marlena decided to bring him out of the hypnosis.

Several mo0ments later, John opened his eyes, feeling the fabric of his shirt stick to the sweat of his skin in an uncomfortable way. His eyes lifted to meet Marlena's, and she whispered, "Would you like some water, John?"

"Yes," he said shakily, sitting up with some effort. Marlena handed him the water, their fingers brushing as he took the glass, and their eyes locked again. "Thanks."

Sitting beside him, she gently rubbed her hand over his back, "Are you okay?"

"I don't know," he said. "It's weird, you know? It's almost as if I just got my tattoo... I can still feel the pain in my shoulder..."

"I recorded the session, and I took notes, if you ever want to review it," Marlena said, beginning to stand up.

John reached for her arm, halting her movement, "Could you... just sit with me for a moment?"

Marlena nodded, watching his hand shake as he held the glass of water, "Are you sure you're okay, John?"

"No," he whispered. "Stefano's voice. I can hear him in my mind, and I can hear him saying that I belong to him. He owns me, and Doc, even though I know he's gone... I still feel the fear like it just happened."

Marlena ran her fingers along his jaw, gently. "John, you're making excellent progress with the hypnosis. You don't have to rush this process. We can take a couple weeks off, if you would like?"

Shaking his head, John said, "No. No, Doc. I need to know. I need to know more about Maison Blanche. I need to know more about how I came to be under his control." His hand reached for hers when she dropped it from his face, and he threaded their fingers together. Looking at their entwined hands he said gently, "Thank you."

Her voice was soft when she told him, "You don't need to thank me, John. I practically forced you to let me help."

"Thank you, all the same," he said, rubbing the pad of his thumb over her palm. "You were right. I wouldn't have been able to do this with any other doctor. The trust required... it wouldn't have worked."

"John, I would do anything for you... anything," Marlena whispered. Their eyes locked again, and she imagined what it might feel like to kiss him again, to feel his hands on her body. Clearing her throat, she stood up quickly, "So, your next appointment... let me see what I have available..."