Evening Star: Edward's Story

Chapter Twenty-Five: Pillow Talk

“Do you have any idea how much I love you, Bella?” I whispered in her ear as my cold fingers caressed her lovely face. “Do you have any idea how much you have changed me?” I watched her face flush pink with the beautiful blush I loved, but she didn't answer as she attempted to hide her face against my chest. I prayed that she would hear me this time, that she would truly understand the immense transformation she had wrought in me.

“I have been alone for so long, Bella. For over eighty years. And for almost all of that time, I have been surrounded by multiple pairs of perfectly-matched lovers. Carlisle found Esme shortly after he created me. Rosalie wasn't far behind, and Emmett not long after that. It was a while before Alice and Jasper joined us, but I have always been the odd-man out. Esme worried that Carlisle had changed me when I was too young—too young to find love.”

I cleared my throat, my adopted mother's love and concern touching me, as it always did. Esme knew me better than anyone, even better than Carlisle or Alice. She was the one who understood fully how I had suffered through those years, and she may have been the only one who comprehended that when I struck out on my own, it wasn't merely to satisfy my thirst for human blood—it was also to escape the loving thoughts of Carlisle and Esme which drove me to envy at times and to despair at others. I sighed, then returned to my story.

“But then I found you, love, and my life went from the deepest, blackest night to being lit with the most beautiful of stars—the Evening Star—the star by which sailors have navigated their ships for centuries, by which travelers have found their way safely through the darkest of nights. You are that star, Bella, the perfect Evening Star, and now my life is altered beyond recognition. I now know happiness, contentment, joy, and true love. I am no longer the loner, the unmatched one, the odd-man out. I have you, and my life is now and forever complete.” My eyes warmed with my eternal love for this human girl, and as I stared into her brown eyes, the love that shone from my eyes seemed to melt hers as Bella's tears gathered, her emotions reacting to my words.

“I love you with all of my heart, Isabella Swan, and I will love you every moment of my existence. Nothing can ever change that. I will love you to the very end of time—for all eternity.” As my words stopped, I lowered my lips to hers, gently kissing her.

And this kiss possessed no urgency, no passion. It was a heart-deep expression of my love for her, and of her love for me. It was chaste, pure, and very sweet.

When I raised my head, I was not surprised to see her tears continuing to flow. I felt a pricking sensation in the inner corners of my eyes; if I were able to weep tears of joy, my tears would be mingling with hers at this moment. Instead, I smiled warmly at her, again expressing my love to her wordlessly, and she smiled back through her tears. She laughed softly as I kissed the tears, then her eyelids, and finally her nose. She giggled again.

I peeked at her window and saw the barest lightening of the darkness, signaling the coming of daybreak. “You need sleep, my love.” And I lay down beside her again, gathering her into my arms. Bella nestled against me, burrowing her nose into my chest, and I smiled, content at last after such a very long day apart and such powerful emotions that had tormented me yet had brought such inexpressible joy that I felt as if I were overflowing with her love and the grace of her body tucked against mine.

Moments later, she was asleep, and as I held her close to my icy body, I sighed with utter happiness.

Thankful that today was a Sunday, I let Bella sleep, contentedly holding her close through the early morning hours, only moving around six when I sensed Charlie outside of Bella's room, his hand on the doorknob. Slipping swiftly and silently behind the bedroom door just as he opened it, I held my breath as he looked in on Bella before leaving for an early day of fishing.