into you

3

he leans down slightly to kiss me, he's 6 inches taller then me. but when we're laying here, he's only 3 inches taller then me. it's crazy how height difference changes depending on how your next to each other

"we don't have any events we're supposed to do today, it's just going around and exploring" clay tells me smiling softly, i don't answer him. i only look up at him

"i need to get tina to cover our necks with makeup" i tell him as i gently touch his neck, he smiles at me "why not any of the other girls?" he asks me softly "because i trust her more than anything, i know she would do all in her power to not mention anything related to it so she won't accidentally leak our relationship" i tell him smiling at the thought of tina. i haven't known her for that long, but i trust her with everything. she was the first one i ever admitted my feelings for clay to

"i might go to kristen for help, my skin tone matches her more. you and tina are paler then me, so people would easily notice something off about my neck" he tells me, i laugh at him

Time skip a couple of hours

i watch dream silently, i don't say much to him but i know i don't need to "you never came to my room last night" karl says as he sits down beside me "i talked to clay" i say as we watch the others have fun

"i thought you didn't want to be near him because he was lying to you" karl says confused, i shake my head "that's what i told myself, because that is what i wanted it to be. clay is the new him. and im scared. im scared of loving someone the way i loved him. but clay is not the new him. because he would never hurt me and use me the way luke did. but i know if he did, i would let him use my body for how he desires to use it. and im scared of that" i turn to karl, he gives me a comforting smile

"he knew, he knew why i got myself to get into bed with him. of course he knew. because clay knows everything" i say to him, he only nods

we look at the idiots "it's me" he says suddenly after a long silent moment, i look at karl confused on what he's saying "nick. it's me nick is secretly seeing, im scared of people's reaction to me being queer, let alone dating my best friend, so i told him i want it to be a secret. but we're not dating, we can see other people if we want to, but we don't see other people" karl explains to me, i smile at him

"thank you for telling me" i say to him, he smiles at me "what are you two talking about" clay says sitting down beside me, i shake my head "nothing" i tell him, he just shrugs and put his arm around my shoulders "clay, everyone is here" i say to him, he smiles at me "everyone but quackity knows here. i figured he should join in on knowing about us" i turn and look at nick in shock, turning back and forth between the two of them

"how long has he known" i ask him "since kristen covered me up, i didn't want him to feel like we were hiding stuff from him" i only nod at him and turn towards nick and quackity talking, suddenly i feel him remove his arm from me. when i turn to ask him why i notice creators coming this way

it's nice to be able to meet my fans, i love them trust me i do. but. i can't be physical with clay around people, i know he wouldn't mind. but i do. i can't bring myself to tell the internet im gay and dating my best friend, at least not now. i study dream as he hugs and greets different people "it's sucks, but it just feels more safe when nobody knows and it's just your own thing" karl says, i don't ask him what he's talking about. i just nod, because i know he's talking about being in a relationship that nobody knows about

"i just want to walk up to him and kiss him, let people know he's my boyfriend. and im his and his only. but i can't. i can't bring myself into letting people know" i start off turning to him "because then it makes it real, it's makes it real that i love him like i love luke. and i don't want that, because fuck it's scary" i say, karl nods at me. silently telling me he knows what i mean