Marina Oneshot Book

Anti-Hero

Sometimes I feel like everyone is a sexy baby

    And I'm a monster on the hill

    Too big to hang out

    Slowly lurching toward your favourite city

    Pierced through the heart but never killed

    Did you hear my covert narcissism?

    I disguise as altruism like some kind of congressman?

    (Tale as old as time)

    I wake up screaming from dreaming

    One day I'll watch as you're leaving and life will lose all its meaning

    (For the last time)

Carina had since woken up, hearing Maya muttering to herself in the bathroom. Rubbing her eyes, she turned on the bedside lamp and checked the time. 2:09am. She knew Maya must have come home from work so she picked up her book and started reading. But once she heard a 'thump' on the bathroom floor, she flew out of bed and swung the bathroom door open.

    There, Maya was laying on the floor, eyes closed. Carina noticed the bandages on her arms and legs, gasping silently. She checked for a pulse and was grateful to find one. Maya looked so frail when she laid her on their bed and it was easy for Carina to move her there, which confused her. Normally it was Maya doing all the lifting. But since Maya was so frail, Carina worried. She figured that Maya was dehydrated and not eating enough, which cut a crack through her heart, but she got some water and something small for Maya to eat when she woke up again.

"C-Carina?"

    Smiling softly, Carina helped Maya sit up and drink some water. "Bambina, you scared me. Are you OK?"

    "Si, Carina. I don't think I hit my head."

    Carina nodded, watching Maya's eyes staring straight ahead. "Maya, my love, what's wrong? I'm worried about you, bambina."

    "I-I don't know," Maya answered. "I don't know if I'm okay, Carina. I don't even recognise myself anymore."

It's me

    Hi

    I'm the problem, it's me

    At teatime

    Everybody agrees

    I'll stare directly at the sun, but never in the mirror

    It must be exhausting always rooting for the anti-hero

After some silence of both women in their own thoughts, Maya sighed. She knew something had to be said and she knew it had to be from her side, no matter how much she wanted to deny it.

    "I'm not OK, Carina."

    Carina was shocked. She had no idea Maya would be the first to speak. She was always the one that initiated the hard conversations. But Carina knew that this type of confession had to come from Maya herself.

    "I need help," Maya stated. "I want to be better. I want to know what's going on in my head. I need to be OK for when we have a baby. I don't want to be my dad."

"You aren't your dad, bella," Carina said, holding Maya's hand and gently rubbing her back. It hurt her to see her wife this... defeated. This was a rare sight, too. "What do you need me to do?"