It's not a girl (bxb)

Shit

Lol lmao ahahahahah I'm not okay right now
Y'all I just finished Brokeback Mountain and I'm the one who's broken

The fact that I've never played Mario Cart is probably going to anger some people so imma say it

Your mom

Nathan

"Nathan? Are you in there?" Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. This isn't happening, no way, uh uh, I'm hallucinating.

"Nathan you sleeping?" Not hallucinating. Real. Real real real. Ok fuck

I instantly get off of Scott and run into my room trying not to make to much noise, but to no avail. I knock over a few cups I had left on my floor causing them to fly all over and hit as many objects as they could before stopping.

"What are you doing" Shut up

"Nothing, god, I was fucking sleeping what is it?" I quickly lay on my bed and get under the covers.

"No you weren't, I know you're a light sleeper and with all the noise coming from someones room," He gets louder probably trying to tell the noise maker he needs to shut up "you physically couldn't be sleeping." AHHHHHHHHHHHH

"It's none of your business." He's pissing me off

"Yeah but dayum, someone was loud!" Yeah someone was.

"What are you taking about?" Actually do I even want him to tell me?

"Well someone was you know, whoever's over is obviously the bottom ," ... "They're very vocal," ... " They aren't-"

"YEAH I GET IT EW THANK YOU, FUCK OFF NOW!"

Scott

"Ew"? I know he's lying but it still hurts to hear. Also I know I wasn't being that loud, Sam just has super human hearing.

Sam

Im not really sure what to do anymore so I just walk back down stairs.

So many thoughts are in my mind and I just want some ramen. So when I open the pantry and there isn't any, I just want to scream.

Nathan

I can basically feel the relief when I hear the front door slam shut. I almost got caught. Scott almost got caught. And I don't think Sam fully understands what happened.

Did he hear Scott say my name? That's why he knocked on my door. He heard.

I take a few steps towards my bathroom door, Scott still hasn't cleaned it but it's fine, the only thing I'm worried about is if Scott is okay.

I feel so awkward though, just trying to go into the bathroom is making me want to hyperventilate. Why am I so nervous?, it's just Scott.

That's the thing, it's Scott. He's my brothers best friend, and we passed so many boundaries already, but he's also more than that to me, he's someone I've known for six years and lived with for four. He's someone I've spent countless nights thinking about. Maybe he didn't notice me then but he does now and I don't need that to stop.

Ok so sorry this chapter is really short and trash because I wasn't sure what to do with it 🧍‍♂️so anyways bye

I just watched Barbarian and idk what to feel, like so many emotions are happening yet none as well. It's scary tho so that's good ig. I would definitely watch it again or a second movie

Kill me I get so fucking paranoid I start hallucinating and it sucks

The good thing tho is that I have aphantasia so I don't have to remember the scary lady's face :)

I can't remember any of my childhood and that's giving me bad grades rn