Pure Stupidity (Konosuba x Male Reader)

The Almighty Toads

I woke up to a wet substance on my shoulder area and I see Aqua literally drooling on my shoulder while locking my arm in place.

"What the hell? Get off me!"

I push her off which wakes her up and I hear Kazuma walking to our stable.

"Aqua, why were you slobbering all over my shoulder? That's gross!"

Aqua: "I-I'm sorry, Y/N! I didn't know I was doing that."

"Whatever, at least your face looked normal for a second when you were sleeping."

I got up and walked towards Kazuma.

"Kazuma!"

Kazuma: "Kazuma here."

"You said we needed to go get jobs today right? I was thinking why don't we go apply at a shop or something since we both have good amounts of luck which is perfect for merchants!"

Kazuma: "But you're a crusader. You should be off killing giant monsters or something."

"But that's booooring! I wanna do something with my friends!"

Kazuma: "Me and Aqua will handle the manual labor part of money making. You can go get a quest or something."

"Fine, I'll go get a kill quest or something."

I left the stables and started walking towards the guild.

---

Luna: "Welcome back, Y/N!"

"Hello to you as well, Luna. Do you know where the quests are?"

Luna: "Yup! They're right there to your right. If you see one that peaks your interest, come back and talk to me to accept the quest."

"Alright, thanks."

I walk over to the quest board and see a lot of quests that haven't been accepted yet. I was about to pick a quest that required me to slay five toads that have been roaming the area before I was stopped with another hand about to pick that same quest.

"Hey, that's my-"

I looked to my right and saw a blonde haired woman that looks to be at least three years older than me. I was quickly taken aback by her looks.

???: "S-Sorry, I was about to pick that quest too..."

"No problem, we could always do it together, if you'd like to."

???: "That sounds nice. What's your class?"

"I'm of the crusader class and my name is Y/N L/N, what about you?"

Darkness: "I am also of the crusader class. You can call me Darkness."

"That names sounds both edgy and cool..."

"Nice to meet you, let's go take the quest together."

Darkness and I both accepted the quest as a temporal alliance and set out to kill the toads. Along the way, I tried to make some small talk.

"So, you have any friends or a party?"

Darkness: "I do have a friend but not really a party to join. Do you?"

"I have a party but we basically just started out and haven't really recruited anyone yet. But, you look strong so I'm surprised you weren't invited by anyone."

Darkness smiles at me and we continue walking until we see a field full of giant toads.

"HOLY SHIT THEY ARE MASSIVE!"

Darkness: "T-They look pretty strong and tough..."

"Are you okay? You scared?"

Darkness: "I-I am not scared! Just the thought of being slowly gobbled up by those creatures..."