Pure Stupidity (Konosuba x Male Reader)

Prologue

POV: Y/N L/N

I was on the phone, talking with my friend at the time named Andrew. Andrew and I go a long way back and we share the same interests. After talking to him, I got off my chair after a while of playing some games with online friends and I was feeling a bit hungry so I decided to check if I had any snacks left.

I walk towards the kitchen and open up the cabinet. 

"Shit, nothing's here. Ah well, might as well just go to the grocery store then."

I decided that since there was no food and that my parents were out, I would go get some food for myself and make myself a meal. I got on some outside clothes which consisted of standard jeans, a white hoodie and my favorite pair of shoes which I had since the 8th grade.

Leaving through the front door, I walked across the street and successfully made it inside the grocery store. I went inside and got a few ingredients and snacks for myself then I payed and left. While I was walking back home on the road, I noticed a car racing towards me but I quickly jumped back and wiped a sweat off my face.

"I'm not dying that easily, that's for- OH SHIT!"

Truck-kun always wins in the end...

---

???: "Y/N L/N, you have died."

"Wh-where the hell am I?"

???: "You, Y/N L/N, have died and came here to be reincarnated."

"Reincarnated? What?!"

I look around me and see this brown-haired guy wearing a green tracksuit looking down in dismay. 

"H-hey. Are you good, whatever your name is?"

Kazuma: "My name is Kazuma and yes, I'm fine. Just getting over the whole dying part."

Aqua: "I forgot to introduce myself! My name is Aqua and I am a goddess."

"I can clearly see that, seeing as you are literally shining in this dark room!"

Aqua: "Yup! Anyway, you both have three choices to pick from. You either go to heaven, be reincarnated as a baby or be reincarnated to a world that is under attack by the Devil King and you take one power to help you!"

"Well, if it wasn't obvious enough, I'll be taking the third option. What about you, Kazuma?"

Kazuma: "I'll go with the third option as well."

I noticed that he said that with a sad tone, so I decided to comfort him a little.

"Hey man, I know it was hard that you died but no use really fawning over it now. Instead, let's just talk how we died."

Aqua bursted out with laughter while Kazuma was getting silently angry while I was just plain confused.

"What is it? What's so funny?"

Aqua: "It's just that, this kid right here had the funniest death I have ever seen!"

Kazuma: "Don't you dare tell him!"

"Please do, I promise I won't make fun of you."

Aqua: "He died trying to save a girl from a slow moving tractor that wasn't ever going to touch her! When he pushed her out the way, he was so scared at the thought of getting ran over, he died of shock!"

I was just baffled at how stupid this guy's death was but I look over and see he was getting visibly frustrated with how this goddess was making fun of him literally dying so I walked up to him and put my hand on his shoulder.