The kelpie chronicles

I'm a dickhead fish-horse

"That's my human!" I screech and lunge forward at the intruder daring to approach said human with questionable intent.
Amos just laughs and pats my muzzle. "Don't worry about him" he smiles to the now frightened stranger. "He just doesn't like when fans act too friendly."

Just a moment ago that guy's hand almost landed on my human's ass when he randomly gave him a clumsy hug! Why is my human so chill at this moment?! I lift my head sharply from Amos' hand and do my grumpy head shake. The stranger apologizes and disappears into the buzzle of people around us. We just finished a race and the crowd is going nuts over the winner. wasn't us, altho it should have. I got a dang bad start in that gate and still managed to catch up to the lead horses, I would have surpassed them too if the finish line hadn't come out of nowhere! I'm fast, really fast. Stupid fast even, and very strong for my size. That's on top of being a horse.

Amos starts to walk me into the tunnel that leads to the stables. It's a cool idea, the horses and jockeys appear out of a dark tunnel and the crowds go nuts for it. I liked it when we appeared and everyone applauded!

Moments later I'm getting tied to the poles where my gear is taken off so Amos can be weighed with them. Amos is my jockey and my human. Did I mention he is my human? You better fucking remember it! The weighing is something something to make sure things are fair or whatever, honestly, I could probably win with two of those special heavy saddle pads on me if I got a good start one of these days!

Now my human is gone and I'm being walked into my box, right next to Prince. Prince Infinite is a spicy new talent that the owner of my stable has had his eye on for a moment now. The name apparently was given because they thought she was a stallion. Honestly she's about as aggressive as one so I don't blame them. She really doesn't like me. She hates everyone, humans, other horses, especially other horses, but I'm special, and very hateable, so I think she hates me the most. I'm so calm tho, that they put me next to her. Others might get upset by her constant banging and yelling whenever someone moves or breathes or exists in general in her vicinity. I don't care tho, she can't hurt me even if she tried. I would eat her easily.

The stable boy reaches for my golden halter, his intention to hang it next to the door of my box. I proceed to freak the fuck out. "You dare to touch my halter!? It's worth more than your parents make in a decade!" I yell and rear up, the lead rope slipping from his grasp. The boy lets out a scream and his ass hits the door of the box on the other side of the hall so fast it's comical. I very much enjoy fucking with unsuspecting humans. Does that make me a bad person?.... Yes, yes it does.

I flick my head so the lead rope flies through the air and comes to rest loosely around my neck, out of the way of my front feet. I grab the box door with my lips and bring it almost close. "I don't want it locked" I inform the stable boy. He nods and wanders off with a face like he had seen a ghost. You would think people would expect the unexpected when a horse with fins and nails instead of hoofs is given to them to care for, but nope, I guess no one pays any attention to anything anymore these days.

An amused huff sounds from Prince's side of the wall. I look over to see her eye peeking from a small gap between the pieces of plywood put up to keep her from seeing into my box. "Glad you enjoyed the show" I tell her with a lower speaking voice and a grin. That causes her expression to go sour again and her eye disappears from the gap. My guess is she just turned her ass at me to sulk. Oh well, it was fun for the nanosecond it lasted.

A short horsenap later Amos shows up at my door. When I greet him he flics my muzzle with his finger. Ouch! Guess the stable boy tattled.

"When are we leaving?" I eagerly ask, ignoring the mild if not nonexistent punishment I got.

"Owner wants to see Prince in action before we leave." He picks up the lead rope from around my neck. "You will help me walk her nice."

Oh goodie, work. I follow him obediently outside anyway, to a show of Owner standing around with some other rich looking dude. As they blabber on, I come to the vague understanding that this is Prince Infinite's owner. Soon to be ex owner in fact, Owner sounds very eager to buy her. From behind us I hear The steps of a human and a horse, and then the other owner's main stable hand is next to us with Prince at her side. I'm impressed for a moment from how calmly she stands for her, buuut then she tries to kick me, and all's right in the world again. Just once tho. When I said Prince hates humans, I didn't mean that she is disobedient. She's very obedient in fact. I think it's the military level structure for everyone. I know what the military is like because I went to the navy submarine people. Well Amos went and I followed the sub around. Anyway, Prince just loves to fuck with inexperienced helpers. And she talks shit behind their backs.

"I want to see her walking." The owners tell us after murmuring amongst each other for a while. Amos starts walking me parallel to them and at 10 or so meters he turns me around and walks me back. Prince follows at a safe distance. At first I questioned why I was needed since Prince wishes to kill all other horses and vaguely horse shaped beings on this planet, but now the stable yard is full of cars and people and a lot of noise. A prey animal as stressed as her might go apeshit from way less. The point of this exercise is for Owner to make sure she doesn't have bad legs and for the other owner to get the opportunity to gloat about his masterpiece of genetic engineering. Or breeding. What ever.

"Now run" Comes the next instruction. Amos starts jogging and I trot next to him. Behind us, at a safe distance Prince and the stable girl follow us at the same pace. At 10 meters Amos turns me around again and we trot back to our starting point. Yet again the owners murmur amongst each other, when Hailie, Owner's daughter and mine and Amos' bestie shows up, riding gear on and saddle and bridle in her arms.

"I want to know how she rides" She announces to both owners.

"She would be Hailie's horse." Explains Owner to the other. Prince's owner's face looks unsure, but he nods.

Looks to me like an unplanned decision on Hailie's part, or maybe she intended to catch the guy off guard because he would have refused to let her ride, or whatever. In any case, Hailie has already saddled Prince and flinging herself to the saddle.

The stable girl walks the two around the yard for a minute to make sure everything is properly attached and then with a klick she removes the lead rope and steps next to me and Amos.

Hailie takes Prince around the yard in all three speeds, first walk, then trot, then gallop.

And Prince just... doesn't go apeshit. Not even once does she do anything that Hailie didn't order her to do. The traffic moving right next to her doesn't make even her ear twitch the tiniest bit. It's like she isn't afraid of anything.

Hailie's face is beaming as she brings Prince to a halt and hops off her.
"Sold" She announces at the same time her boots hit the ground with a thud. And Prince doesn't even care. For a prey animal she isn't very flighty.

The owners move inside to discuss price and Hailie and the stable girl take Prince inside to take the gear off. That leaves just me and Amos outside. Finally! I was so bored!

-

Yeah, about that following the, submerged, submarine bit, I'm a kelpie. I swim, really well. That's what happens when you inhabit the dark depths of Scottish lakes and rivers for ages. It also means I can turn into a human at night. I know traditionally it's during the day, shut up. The point is, I'm currently sitting in a fast food joint that shall go unnamed, where Amos has brought upon me my most beloved: the cheeseburger. "Can I has Cheeseburger" is my favorite meme, that's the reason. And I guess it tastes fine, altho I do prefer the flesh of the innocent over this hyperpalatable, lab engineered human feed. I guess I'm picky, sigh.

My sharp teeth intended to rip up fish and children makes quick work of the mushy blob of sustenance, and I end up having to wait for him to be done eating for a while. Humans eat so calmly, it weirds me out every time. Wild creatures such myself have to eat any meal we manage to catch before someone else eats it out of our mouths, such is life in the wild.