My Reincarnated Life Is Wrong, Source: Me

Episode 1

She blinked and arched an eyebrow.

"...Existential crisis huh, is that the reason you wrote this death threat? Are you going crazy or are you just an idiot?"

She let out another sigh and pulled a hand through her hair, it was sexy as hell. Seriously why is she still single? Ok, I get marriage, but she should at least have boyfriend. Is it just because of the plotline? Shit, I don't want think about that right now. I'm ignoring it.

This world is just a—

Ignore it damn it!

A bundle of paper struck my head.

"Pay attention!"

"Yes."

"Your eyes are too lifeless, like that of a dead rotting fish."

"Thank you, your eyes are lovely." I answered, voice monotone.

Don't lose your filter you fool!

Her mouth falls agape.

"That wasn't a- wait you think my eyes are—"

She fake coughs into her hand from embarrassment.

"—Don't think you can flatter your way out of this."

"Tch."

The corners of her mouth twitched upwards after I clicked my tongue.

"I'm giving you one last chance to explain yourself, Hikigaya: what's with this pointlessly condescending paper? How could you have thought ending it with a death threat was, in any way, a good idea?!"

"The essay topic was 'Looking back on high school life' right? I did share my thoughts about high school life and I did finish the topic with what I thought was a satisfying conclusion. I wrote what you asked, so therefore I am not at fault here."

"No you ARE at fault here you idiot! This paper looks more like a death threat than an essay! I'd expect you to reflect on your personal experience, not...whatever you call this!"

Hiratsuka-sensei cried out with more than a little force behind it.

Yeah, yeah, Shizuka you're 'seriously scary', but I've just faced death and I won't let the last genuine thing Hikigaya Hachiman did be in vain...even if cringe on this essay is over 9,000.

"The preference to the topic, didn't say so. I would have followed it, if it did. Yet it did not, so I refuse to rewrite this essay. Besides, asking people to kill themselves is NOT a death threat."

"Watch your mouth, I'm your teacher you brat."

"Even so I refuse, and do you know how annoying it is to be called a brat by someone who acts like they're forever seventeen when they're really twenty—"

There was a gush of wind. It was a fist. A fist that was unleashed without any indication of movement. And if that weren't enough, it was an impressive fist that just grazed the side of my cheek.

"The next one won't miss." Her eyes were serious.

I knew that this was coming but, holy shit that was seriously scary!

"S-sorry I said too much, but I still refuse to rewrite this essay sensei."

I bow at a forty-five degree angle the like the corporate slave I'm likely to become. Failing my client hurts my (now) Japanese heart.

"I'm very sorry."

"...Fine."

Straightening up I observed her reaction.