Wrong number (HxH)

Chapter 73

And then we attempted to find a fucking town or city. Key word: attempted. Who the fuck creates a game with miles of absolute nothingness!

At this point I might be glad to see another human. And humans are just... ew. (Ah yes, me being an introvert-)

"Hey I see a city!" Gon shouted.

"It better have an ice cream shop." Kalluto muttered. Do we want to question what would happen if there isn't an ice cream shop? Probably not.

Kalluto's addiction is perfectly normal guys. We don't question my parenting skills. I'm very capable.

Once they got to the city thing (I'm to sleep deprived to remember if it's a city, state, country, continent, or town-)

"After we find an ice cream shop we should look for some sort of map." Killua suggested.

Luckily we found an ice cream shop. And it only took Kalluto killing anyone who didn't tell him where the ice cream shop was! Haha- please don't hurt me.

I'm not scared of Kalluto, he's just...

...

I'm scared of Kalluto.

Anyways, after we got Kalluto to leave the ice cream shop we looked for a map.

Yo, did that person just explode?

(I barely remember anything from the Greed Island arc, so half the things you read here might be complete bullshit-)

And now we're following some random stranger to meet up with other random people. This is very safe kids. Whenever a murderer is wandering around you follow complete strangers. It's extremely safe. Trust me.

After an extremely long (it probably wasn't even 5 minutes) explanation about the wanna be Bakugo

"So you're basically trying to collect a cult of people to beat someone in an insignificant game, because you think money is more important than your lives?" Killua questioned.

"Well when you phrase it like that-"

"Sounds gay, let's go speedrun the game." Kalluto cut off.

Yes, you all get another time skip.

"Is nobody else questioning why is the real life version of Barbie following us?" I asked.

"Eh, we'll lose her at some point." Killua replied.

Why is everyone obsessed with these kids? First a clown chases after them, then they get kidnapped by a cult, and now it's a Barbie wannabe. At least Kalluto doesn't make pedophiles chase after him.

...

Y'know I think half of our problems happen because we're always causing chaos. Eh, it's fineeee.

Now back to running away from a Barbie.

All I remember is some ninjas needing help or some shit so- after that? (Yes, this is another timeskip)

"Woah! When you catch these they turn into cards!" Gon said. Hmmm, sounds kind of familiar.. catch animals, then put them in a small, confined place... collecting cards..

"So we're basically trying to play Pokémon in real life?" I asked. Wow Ging, just because copyright doesn't exist in this world doesn't mean it's morally acceptable. I can forgive mass murder, but copyright? You're just pure evil.

I- this is kind of sad. I don't think I've seen a professional assassin as idiotic as Killua.

I was currently watching, and making fun of, Killua and Gon as they tried to catch more Pokémon. Yes, I will be referring to everything as Pokémon. Fuck Ging and his copyright.

First he abandons his child, then he doesn't even pay child support, and then he makes Pokémon in a different font and calls it his own game? Pure evil.

(The author has finally given up and started rewatching the Greed Island arc- now only 99% of the things will be complete bullshit)

"Gyo!"

Wait isn't that Barbie?

"Use Gyo! You know how to don't ya?" Barbie shouted. No don't help them out, watching them fail miserably was fun!

"See, the armor is just a puppet! Attacks aren't going to work against it!"

After hearing that amazing piece of advice Gon actually caught a Pokémon.

"So you guys can use Gyo. Then why didn't you use it before, huh?" Barbie questioned. Because both of them are idiots.

"Well I- uh."

"You forgot, didn't you?" Barbie said, putting her finger up. Why the fuck you making a number? Are you gonna teach them how to count? They already know how to count... probably.

"Don't just stand there, use Gyo! Now, tell me what you see?"

"The number one."

"Very good, now listen up. When I raise my finger, I want you to use Gyo. Then yell out whatever it is you see, alright? They same applies if you sense anything suspicious." Barbie said.

Hm, I should stop calling her Barbie, they're basically insulting Killua, making them a respectable human being.

"And what makes you think you can order us around?" Killua questioned.

Barbie- I mean respectable human being raised her finger.

"I see the number five!" Gon shouted. Wow, you aren't a complete idiot. Congratulations.

"Correct. You, give me 200 push-ups!" They ordered, pointing at Killua. You are more than a respectable human being, you are a god.

"Hey! What the hell! Why should I!?" Killua shouted. Lol, fucking loser.

"Got a problem?" Oo, sassy queen. (My literal thought when I saw this scene-)

"Yeah! Just who do you think you are, huh!?"

"I forgot, I should introduce myself. See, I'm a pro hunter. The name's Biscuit Krueger. And 40 years ago, I learned Nen. And now I'm going to use my knowledge and experience to give you some much-needed coaching. You should both be eternally grateful." Slay- wait 40 years?

"You learned Nen 40 years ago!?"

"You're just a hag!"

Oooo, that brother's floating in the airrrr. How can his hands do this? Ohhhh, someone get him out the airrr.

And that's how a started praising a Barbie as my lord and savior.

Word count: 1600

Fun Facts:

• Bro I forgot how happy everything was before the chimera ant arc- now I know why people told me just to stop at the end of Greed Island (wish I did but also- really cool fight scenes make my brain go brrrrr)

• You may have noticed that my updates are pretty slow rn- that's because I write 2 chapters before publishing 1- I need extra chapters so whenever I finish writing this I can either: mass update, or immediately start writing a new fanfic-

• To all of you who told me to sleep at the top of this chapter, no. I come up with the best ideas when I'm sleep deprived. Jinx wouldn't exist if I didn't decide to write while I was extremely sleep deprived.