At all Cost

Chapter 06

We are on our way back to the school. I was busy watching the view outside. Nakasandal ang siko ko sa gilid ng bintana ng kotse habang nakapahalumbaba. All I could see a while ago was all bright green, but then now that we we're getting nearer to the city, all I could see was establishments, buildings, shops and houses.

Venzon, on the other side was focusing on driving. It's already two'oclock in the afternoon and there's thirty minutes left before my next class.

"Are we friends now?" he suddenly asked breaking the silence that enveloped us. I take a quick glimpse of his direction. His focus is still on the road. He's driving using his right hand while the other one was leaning on the window. Nakabukas ang bintana sa gilid niya kaya bahagyang hinahangin ang itim na itim nitong buhok.

Itinuon kong muli ang atensyon sa labas ng bintana. Friends? Do I need a friend? Someone you can call whenever you feel like alone? I have already friends in the agency I worked in, but, whenever I feel like my whole world is fucked up all I have is myself. I never try to reach them just to have someone on my side. As long as I can handle my sadness I will never bother someone.

"What's with the sudden change of heart? As far as I remember you were against with my plans." instead of answering his question I threw him another question diverting the topic that he started.

"I don't want you to get involve."

"Why? Concern eh?"

"Yes..."

Natawa ako ng pagak. I opened the window of his luxury car. A gushing wind touches my skin making me feel at ease. I didn't know that he could make my chest constrict. Dinama ko ang banayad na pag ihip ng hangin sa aking mukha na nakapag-pagaan ng kalooban ko.

"I didn't know you have this kind of side, Mr. Venzon... funny." I mumbled.

"I'm not goofing around!" he exclaimed.

I laughed a bit.

"Tell me what's your plan?"

"Answer my question first." his eyes still on the road. I snorted. Here we go again!

Napapaisip ako kung tama ba ang naging desisyon kong makipag-tulongan sa taong ito? I don't know if he's taking this shit seriously or he's just bored. Masama na ba ang lagay ng utak niya?

Hindi ko nalang pinansin ang sinabi niya ay pinagmasdan ko nalang ang mga kabahayan. Namutawing muli ang katahimikan sa pagitan naming dalawa ngunit hindi man lang ako nakaramdam ng pagka-ilang o pagka-asiwa.

The wind kissing my bare face, blowing my hair and the silence is comforting. Tuluyan ko nang ipinikit ang mata ko dinadama ang sariwang hangin na humahalik sa balat ko.

"There are things I can't tell you yet, Zannie.." he mumbled out of nowhere.

"How can we help each other if you're not telling me your plans.... how can I do the first move if I have no idea?"

"You don't have to."

"What?" I spat.

"Hindi ikaw ang gagawa ng unang hakbang."

"Kung ganoon sino?"

"Relax first, Ms. Mendez everything is under my control..." inis na hinampas ko ang braso niya. Napaigik ito sa sakit ngunit natawa rin. Inirapan ko ito.

Hindi talaga siya makausap ng matino!

"Are you taking this shit seriously? How can I relax if those scholars are suffering?"

"Bakit pakiramdam ko ay laging ako ang pinagbubuntongan mo ng galit? May sama ka ba ng loob sa'kin?"

"Hindi mo kasi sineseryoso ang mga sinasabi ko!"