The Archer and The Airship » 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕨𝕒𝕝𝕜𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕕𝕖𝕒𝕕 «

Chapter Thirty

  "What are you up to today?" he murmured, planting a big kiss on Judith's head. Zepp smiled to herself, the irony that she had asked Carl that same question not lost on her.

  "I don't know," she admitted. "I haven't really heard from Aaron or anything.." She passed the baby into his arms and bent under the sink to grab a bottle of water, cracking it open with a sharp click.

  She could see Carol's eyebrow raised, though she quickly dropped it when Zepp looked her way. Rick had an unreadable expression, and her skin pricked again with the feeling they were talking about her before she came in.

  "Well," Rick gruffed, awkwardly looking down at his boots. "Actually, Aaron came by this morning. Asked me if you were up for a run today." He glanced at Carol and turned back to Judith, bouncing her as she giggled and screeched.

  Zepp rolled her eyes and tossed the empty water bottle in the recycling bin. "And why couldn't he ask me?" she grumbled.

  Rick and Carol were silent, exchanging a quick glance.

  "Okay," Zepp hissed. "Cut that shit out. What's going on?" She didn't have the patience anymore to try to interpret what people were trying to say. Just say it and get it over with, damn.

  Rick sighed deeply and inched closer. "You haven't exactly been in a good headspace the last few months. We've all pitched in to help you through it. And nobody's saying you need to do anything, I just.. I think you'd be happier if you got out of the house every now and then." He hesitated towards the end, nervous of her reaction. Carol remained silent in the background.

  "I told Aaron to come back later, so if you decide you wanna go then it's up to you," he continued. He reached a hand over to her shoulder, and she flinched. His eyes flashed with hurt before he quickly recovered, withdrawing the gesture.

  She didn't know what to say. Was she a burden to them now? They all had to pitch in, he said. If only he knew, if he knew the thoughts that were running through her mind. What if I can't help anyone? What if someone is in trouble, and I can't save them? What if we lose another friend on my watch?

  She cleared her throat when she realized they were staring at her. How long was she away, lost in her thoughts? "Uh, actually I'm feeling good today." A lie, but what Rick didn't know wouldn't hurt him. "I'll just get ready and pop by his place," she faked a small smile. He seemed to believe her, showing off a wide grin and nodding his head once.

Carol's expression on the other hand, stone cold. She didn't believe Zepp's bullshit for one second, but had the grace not to say anything. They made eye contact, and Zepp looked away, uncomfortable. She ruffled Judith's hair one last time and turned to head upstairs, Carol's gaze burning into her back as she went.

⤐

She hesitated in front of Aaron's house. She didn't even make it up the sidewalk before she stopped, wiping the sticky curls off her forehead. She had left her house with every intention of coming here, committed to going on the run, of being helpful anywhere she can. But her mind wandered. Who is Rick to tell her she needed to get out of the house? She went on a run just yesterday, and almost lost Daryl in the process. The feeling of seeing him lost in the crowd of walkers, of her screaming and begging Glenn to stop the car and let her out. Then seeing him take down the very last one, dropping to his knees in exhaustion. She ran without thinking, barreling into him with full force and speed. The feeling of his firm, hard chest pressed against her body, one hand squeezing the back of her upper thigh, so close to her ass it gave her chills.