The MULTIVERSE of the TRAVELER and the TRAILBLAZER

An Incorrect Summary of Metal Gear Rising:Revengeance (Part 1 Of ???)

METAL GEAR RISING:
REVENGEANCE

*summarized inccorectly

Narrator:So we boot up the game, but it doesn't support high resolutions. To fix this, we head to NeoGaf™ and download a VIRUS. Now I can do any resolution. What amazing gameplay! Our story begins in the 2009 color scheme with our hero Aether protecting President Barfsack O'Crumbo. He's touring his birthplace of Kenya.

Itto burst out laughing at the malicious misnaming over the screen," B-Barfsack O'Crumbo?!"

While some didn't pay attention to him, some were mostly paying closer attention to the Aether onscreen.

N'Mani/Obama:I'm, uh, President United States Obama.

Aether:Mr. President, you have dementia.

N'Mani/Osama:Uhh... Drone-strike the wedding.

Aether:That can be arranged

[(Vine Boom SFX) and the limo stops]

N'Mani's Advisor:What the fuck was that?

Beidou:Insurance fraud.

[The scene switches to a gunner looking down at the man in front of them, Ajax a.k.a. Childe, menacingly approaching them]

"Oh good Gods..."Beidou sighed in annoyance at the sight of the 11th Harbinger over the screen. This is about to spiral downward fast.

Childe:Why hello there, would you care to see my RGB lighting?

[Childe unsheaths the Muramasa...which was glowing with RGB lighting]

Childe:I spent $3000.

"That has to be, if not... One of the oddest swords I have ever seen in my lifetime."Wagner placed a finger over his chin at the sight of the colorful sword," And with a glow like that... Definetly odd."

"Uh huh... And I thought the 11th Fatui Harbinger wasn't already over the top with his whole Foul Legacy form."Diluc merely grumbled, remembering the first time he saw Childe's Foul Legacy.

Maverick Gunner:Sir, this is a Wendy's.

Tartaglia:Oh... I'll just have to give you a demonstration then.

[Tartaglia merely grinned before rushing at the gunner and deflecting the bullets with his RGB sword and sliced the gunner in half]

Everyone's jaws dropped whilst some of the adults managed to cover the eyes of the children just in time before Tartaglia killed the gunner.

"H-He killed that guy with just a swift motion of his blade?! How?!"Bennett shouted, wondering what the fuck was that sword made of.

"The standout bullshit that Konami can get away with."Kiran merely replied with a chuckle as he loved the things that Konami does to their own games.

Beidou:Oh shit, he's got RGB's. Let's get the fuck out.

[The limo driver began to drive away as multiple Maverick operators aim their weapons at Tartaglia...]

Narrator:I guess you could say he's half the man he once was.

[... Who merely gave them a shit-eating grin]