Flying Solo

Chapter 15

3 Months is a very long time when youre a young single parent with bills to pay. Yet at the same time 3 months was no time at all. In the space of a few short weeks, Faith had started to make so many more noises and would giggle at you all day given the chance.

However, given the fact it was now the end of August and some of the dreary autumn rain had started to creep in, Faith was very much a frowny baby. Jordan had tried everything but nothing was fruitiful. Faith was a summer baby and therefore the rain was just not good enough.

Heaven forbid she try and go for a walk with the push and have the rain cover over her. It was the end of the world needing a rain cover.

Despite all this, they were both happy. Thats not to say Jordan didnt have days where all she wished for was 30 secnds of not being needed. From the secon Jordans eyes opened to when they closed again for the night, she was needed or wanted in some way.

Tending to Faiths needs wasn’t the issue. It was the ‘Im popping round’ from multiple visitors who turned up ten minutes later and asked if she was going to make them a brew or put the washing away or tidy Faiths toys away.

At first Jordan apologised and rushed straight on it, however the last week or so she had stopped. She reminded them, that she was a new parent and she was on her own. If they wanted a drink get one. If signs of a well looked after baby were causing them offense then they could leave.

This, as you could imagine, went down like a lead balloon. Jordan reminded herself that those who matter don’t mind and those who mind, don’t matter. Her small army she had to help had dwindled into a village.

Some friends had left her. A common thing to happen when youre 21 and have a 3monthg old baby. All because she wasnt willing to go out every weekend to get violently drunk and wake up regretting every decision. She had responsibilities though. Faith came first, always and some people didnt understand that.

Faith was 3 months old now and had become very proficient a rolling herself to get to where she wanted to be. Luckily she didnt have far to go for what she needed but even still it was giving Jordan palpations when she put her down in one spot and returned to find her somewhere else.

Faith has also gotten so big and Jordan didnt realise how quickly she would grow and how attentive she could be so soon. For example, the toy giraffe that rattled made her bottom lip quiver with anticipated tears but the unicorn teddy her uncle got her made her giggle and squeal.

Every day was a new discovery for Jordan and she absolutely loved exploring them.

Faith had received 2 sets of injections ow and each time was worse than the last. The hurt cry she let out was absolutely heart breaking. Her parents had offered to take her but Jordan had told them that this was something she had to do herself.

Once again Jordan had tried to contact Faiths father but he had blocked her number now. She even tried to go through friends and fdamily members who all shut her down. His family even going as far to say that it couldnt possibly be his and she was a liar and just wanted someone to look after her financially.

That line hurt and Jordan spent a while crying over how horrid people could be but when she saw Faiths little smiling face on the baby monitor she had installed so she could leave her in her cot for naps, she remembered that they didn’t matter.

They had both started going to some baby groups and Faith was thriving and Jordsan was enjoying the social side of going. She loved talking to other mums and sharing stories and tips and advice and there was one mum who had 4 children, Jordan trhought she was hilarious. Jordan couldn’t fathom how she coped, especially when they all seem to bounce off each other and cause a little mayhem.

Jordan felt like these first 3 months had gone by in a flash and would do anything to slow time down. She was back to work in 6 months and that day was creeping closer and closer to her and she was not prepared.

All she could do is enjoy the time she does have left and try not to dwell.

Easier said than done.