Kny characters x reader one shots (mainly male reader)

Giyu x male reader angst + comfort

This was requested by  @autumn_falls2021 also I have 2 important things to say:

1. Sorry for the slow updates, I used to be updating every day but idk if I can anymore so I apologize

2. My school starts on Wednesday which will cause slower updates so I'll try to update the most I can on the weekends and obviously I'll still try to cram in a one shot during the week! 

Caution: This story deals with self-har(cutting)m, thoughts of suicide, thoughts of doing self-harm. If you are dealing with any of these things, just know that you are not alone and can and will get better. I know that's pretty cheesy coming from someone who's not any better. If you ever need to vent to me you can on Wattpad dms or on discord: Sam Storm <3#4903 (please ask first to vent + I'm not good at comforting so just a warning in advance.)

You couldn't focus on anything, not even your own job as a Hashira to slay demons. Everything around you felt pointless and you just wanted to give up. But you couldn't. You had people to save and demons to kill, that overwhelming pressure weighed on your shoulders 24/7. Lately your lack of focus caused a decline in your skills and abilities. You were starting to think if you were even worthy of your position in the first place. 

You were an average strengthed Hashira and also the boyfriend of the Water Hashira, Giyu Tomioka. You loved him a lot, probably more then your own existence. If he weren't here in your life you wouldn't know what you'd do, you probably wouldn't be alive right now without him. The real question is, do you even want to stay alive right now? Just like many other demon slayers, your family was slaughtered by demons at a young age, causing you to have a deep hatred for them before you even started to train as a demon slayer.

Sometimes during missions you felt like having the demon get it's way and kill you. Then it would hit you with all the memories of your beloved and other times you hung out with fellow Hashira. You especially enjoyed hanging out with Rengoku because of his lovely personality and fun nature. He made your days better just as much as Giyu did. Giyu's mere existence made you happy. You were glad he accepted you for who you are while he was glad you accepted him for who he was. The only reason why you haven't ended your life by now was because of him.

So why were you feeling this way? Restless nights, not taking care of yourself properly, finding no joy in the activities you once liked. You were overwhelmed with confusion and emotions. One moment you felt like you could sob your heart away the next moment you got mad at yourself for being weak. How could stupid emotions make you slack off from your job, your very important job. You were being lazy just cause you were sad. Nothing major was happening anyways, so why were you feeling like this? Everything is perfect, despite having demons in this world, everything was fine. You had no real reason to feel like this. You were just... You were just being emotional. You needed to grow up.

Maybe having to grow up quicker with the harsh realities of demons made you so emotional. You never got to blossom into who you should've. If the demons didn't attack, you could've been someone who sewed or baked for a living. A frail flower projected yourself. One disturbance could crumble you down. You felt horrible for being so weak. You failed to realize that it was ok to feel this way, causing you to do things you wish you didn't do.

All these bottled up emotions caused you lash out more at the others resulting to fights and more distrust. You felt like shit. You just wanted this to stop. Sometimes you pondered putting your blade to your neck and slicing. Maybe you could see your family again. Be welcomed by them with open arms. Feel their warm hugs once more. But you knew you shouldn't but you oh so wanted to. Being a Hashira made you feel like you had to be perfect at everything or you'll fail. If you fail then... If you fail then who's going to like you now?