Getting Back To You

Chapter 16

It's two years after Snow died and Peeta and I live together. I've never regretted telling him he can come in that one day. It was one of the best decisions I've ever made. Him and I are one now, we're always together, never leaving each others side. Peeta is the same boy that I had years ago. Except now, he still has his moments when he grabs the back of a chair and flashes bad memories through his head. I worry about it sometimes, wondering if he still feels tortoured, but every night before I go to sleep he tells me how thankful he is for me and he tells me I'm so beautiful. Every time, he gives me this smile that only he could give me.

Peeta wants children, but I tell him I'm not ready, every time. He simply just says okay and it kills me. I know it's what he wants, but I'm not emotionally ready yet.

The war may be over, but Peeta and I still fight our own battles inside of us. I still have nightmares, but once Peeta's strong arms wrap around me, I feel safe. That's something Gale could never give me. He wanted war, but Peeta wants love. I've got enough fire of my own... I need that dandelion in the spring and that's what Peeta gives me everyday.

Peeta takes away that empty, loss feeling that filled me before. Instead he replaces it with warmth and fullness. He takes care of me when I'm sick, he listens to me when I need to talk, and he loves me more than I've ever felt loved. Most of all, we have each other. We know each others struggles.

These days, it's impossible to take pleasure in anything because I'm afraid it will be ripped away from me. Peeta is trying to teach me how to paint because he believes it will help me with my nightmares and my Post Traumatic Stress. One day, Peeta and I will have children and everything will be the way it should've been for every child during the games. I'm going to give them the life that Rue, Prim and I never had. One day, I will have to explain to them why I have nightmares and why Peeta clings to the back of a chair. I'll have to tell them about Prim and about the games, but for now, we live in the moment, without all of that.

Peeta and I take walks and we recently take this scarp book with us. We put memories such as pictures, plants, quotes we've said. I even put Peeta's pearl in it becomes my mother brought it back with her when they arrived.

Peeta asks me about things that happened in the games and things he did when he was with me. When I talk to him, he looks at me the way every girl wants to be looked at. Straight in the eyes, sometime grabbing my hands.

We finally live a life worth living. No one can take it from us. We've already fought our strongest battle, losing eachother.