𝐸𝓇𝑜𝓈

Drowning

I couldn't sleep all night..I was thinking about what happened last night..i felt betrayed.. I felt weak as I couldn't do anything.. I cried the whole night as that scene of the girl kissing jamie kept recurring in my mind.. it really hurts.
We just became a couple but everything is ruined.
I got up from the bed and went to my bathroom. I looked at myself in the mirror. I look pathetic..my eyes are red and my vision is still blurry. I started crying again as I remembered last night , I was about to call Laura and tell her to come over whenI heard a light knock on my door. I quickly wiped my tears away and tried to make myself look a little descent.
I walk to my front door and opened it.

It's Jamie

What is he doing here..he looked like a mess. His hair is all messy, he looked like he didn't sleep for days .. his eyes were red and puffy and so were mine.
He came closer to me and tried to pull me into a hug. But I took a step back and turned my head away.
"Please don't.. "I whispered. I can't talk much, my voice was about to crack.

We entered my house and sat on the couch . He looked into my eyes, but I'm too hurt to look back at his.. I just can't..

"I - I'm so - I'm really sorry for what happened" Jamie starts. He swallows and looks away from me. Now he's the one not looking at me.
"We broke up a long time ago, I didn't think she would show up to our date, believe me." He added.
"It's not about her coming to our - date", I
manage to say. I looked away from him again, but I can feel his eyes on me.
"I know it isn't. But even after everything she has said, I hope you believe me. I can never look to someone expect you , you made me learn what real love is, you changed me brielle... how can I cheat on you when I'm literally deeply in love with you..". I feel the first tear sliding down my
cheek, and I see that his eyes are getting watery too.
" I love you Brielle. I really do.I meant it...I meant it all... I meant everything I did with you." He continued saying.

Jamie closes his eyes, to stop his tears from falling. Seeing him like this, makes me want to hug him and make all the pain
go away, but I know I can't give in. For some reason, I'm not letting myself.
"You - kissed her, Jamie", I finally say. More tears are coming out of my eyes as I picture them kissing again.
"She kissed me."
"You kissed her back !"
I stand up, now crying out loud and looking at him. He stands up also, and he reaches out for
me to calm me down, but I roughly push him away.
"Please, don't make this much harder than it already is". I say to him after I've calmed down again.
"I think it's better if we won't see each
other for a while."
His face falls, and so does mine.
"I'm sorry", I whisper underneath my breath before walking to the door. I open it and told him to leave.
"I will always love you,Brielle", Jamie said
looking into my eyes. I look back into his, tears still falling down my face.
" I love you too , Jamie." I said after closing the door as he left.
I broke down and fell on the ground. I started crying loudly . I can't take this anymore. I feel like I'm dying in the inside. I opened my window as I couldn't breathe anymore.
I don't know if I'm going to see him again.
Perhaps that was the last time I looked him into his eyes...but I'm sure about one thing.. which is I'm going to love him till my last breath...