~NEW MOON~ [2]

🌙| 005. "I miss you, J'- Seb

The garage, which was once an art studio was eating dust, the uncompleted canvas stood in the middle of the room, the four walls its own prison, Sebastian wanted to burn it, burn the whole place down, the lights flickered like they can sense Sebastian's rage- breathe- he tells himself, pulling the shutter behind him, shielding him from all those memories. The grey pained walls were full of canvases hung onto it, paintings of Jasper and Sebastian, together or alone, there was another canvas, filled with line art, weak lines casually drawn onto the fabric, a photo stuck to the corner of the canvas, polaroid, the Cullens with the Swans, a moment before the Bella got cut incident too.

The incident was a turning point, should Sebastian be blaming Bella's clumsiness, a weak laugh escapes his body, the cold winds felt so distant now, it wasn't just the winds. Cold, was of the things Jasper took away with him, the comfort that Sebastian enjoyed from the cold.

The cold shower now pushes him down on the shower tile, legs touching his chest, rolled up in a ball, while he tries to hold himself together, burning every inch of flesh where the water kissed his body, it was strange, how easily things could change- he hated it, every bit of it, how he left him alone, how there's no comfort in cold, how Ella's now just a shell, how this town was suffocating him, laughing at him, taunting him.

Isabella sat on the couch, staring outside the window, searching for a glimpse, the sky turned black, blue, red, black, blue and she kept the same spot.

Sebastian will join her some time, sitting near her legs, keeping his head on her lap, "Ella, say something", he will repeat the same thing, every time he sat with her, staring towards the window, "nothing", Ella will keep on staring, ignoring her twin, "say something, speak now"- there's a fight raging inside her, for some moment, she will appear out of the black sludge, struggling to breathe some air, looking at Sebastian, before she could tell him, the sludge pulls her back, her mind was fighting with herself, forcing her to stay locked.

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The seasons change, the leaves turn brown, red, and orange and Isabella sits in that chair like it's holding her down- her own prison- memories- black sludge- no holy knight to save her.

October

It flew in a blur, Sebastian rejected Paul's invitation for Halloween at the rez, he sits now leaning on Bella's leg, a bowl full of untouched candies sits on his lap, and both of them staring out the window.

Some kids have painted white over them, fangs glowing in the dark- Vampires, a small laugh escapes Sebastian's mouth, smile tugs on Bella's face, how the meaning of myths has been changed for the twins, how they weren't myths anymore, the moon wrapped the twins in silver mist, shadows dancing behind them on the wall.

November

"Sorry, I'm wont  be able to make it", Sebastian hit on send, and the message was delivered to Sam, he has been trying to pull Sebastian from his house, the house reeked of death, waves of sadness passes through the house, Sam hated it, hated what has become of Sebastian, cause of Bella and those vampires.

The neighbors bought Turkey for Charlie, and he was able to get the twins at the table, all of them silently eating the cooked turkey, was it tasty, no one was focused enough to answer that question.

December

Sebastian helps Charlie pulls a Christmas tree into the house, he was better or that's what Charlie thought, a series of never delivered messages were locked inside Sebastian's phone.

His gallery was full of Paul and his photos, posing to cut a tree down or how he tried to bake cookies but ended up covered in flour, Emily was sure to click it and share it with Sebastian, a smile tugs at Sebastian's face but he shakes it off.

Dear Mom,

The world doesn't seem that colorful anymore, it's like when you can't find the perfect color to paint with, it's not very pleasant, I don't like it. Isabella, she's not here anymore, her mind is somewhere else, I can't bear it anymore, this town is crushing my chest, it's hard to breathe- delete-delete-

Sebastian deletes all the text before he starts typing again.

Merry Christmas Mom, there's a file uploaded with the mail, of him and Charlie putting decorations over the tree, Miss you, I love you- sent- delivered.

The blue light from the laptop illuminates Sebastian's raven hair, how messy they have gotten, how his blue eyes looked tired like someone has painted a layer of black over the blue, stealing the light from his eyes, black circles deepened under his eyes, the town was having a toll on him, it was crushing him from inside out.

He switches tabs on the laptop, writing another email.

Alice,

Merry Christmas, I hope Jasper is doing fine, remind him that he can come back home- sent- can't deliver.

He slams the laptop shut, looking outside his window, "I miss you, J", he whispers the word, confessing a sin, after all, to miss someone who made you this miserable, you have to be a sinner to wish for such thing. 

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A/N: THIS CHAPTER IS KINDA MESSY, I TRIED MY BEST

I MAY WRITE A JASPER POV SOON

THE WHOLE THING ABOUT WRITING ABOUT HOW TIME PASSED FOR BELLA IN THE MOVIE IS A NEW FIELD TO ME

DON'T FORGET TO VOTE AND COMMENT.

ILY ALL <3