SNOWBARRY: Sometimes Runs, Sometimes Can't

Chapter 4 - Caitlin's POV

I was shivering. And I won't lie, Barry left me breathless.

The moment he stepped closer, I knew exactly what was about to happen. And I didn't stop him.

I could have. I should have. But I didn't.

It was wrong, but my heart wanted it anyway.

Somewhere along the way, I'd developed feelings for Barry. Real feelings. I hadn't even been aware of them because our friendship had always been enough. Solid. Safe. We had our boundaries, and I thought I was fine with that.

Until...I wasn't.

Until the moment he pulled me closer.

Barry was someone I could read like a book, as if that was my own superpower. 

His eyes had always been his biggest tell. And what I saw in them a moment ago sent a surge of heat through me so intense it made me tremble. 

I hadn't felt this way in so long. Not since... well, not since before I'd lost Ronnie. 

Barry caught me completely off guard, but even if I'd been prepared, I could never have resisted those green eyes. Or those lips I'd already tasted once and had been quietly, desperately wanting to taste again. It wasn't him the first time, I kept reminding myself.

But now...

When his lips met mine, I was barely breathing, and my knees threatened to give out. His arms and the wall at my back were the only things keeping me standing.

If it hadn't been for the call, I think I would have given in right there. 

And I can't even imagine what might have happened if we hadn't been interrupted.

Let's just say I know Barry's physical condition better than he does, and that thought alone pulled me back to reality.

When I started thinking clearly again, panic set in.

What have I done?

Barry answered Cisco's call, and all I could do was stand there, silently wishing the ground would crack beneath me so I could jump. I felt my stomach drop. 

It's not like I didn't enjoy it. I loved every single second of it, and I suppose that was the problem. 

I wanted more of it.

What were we even thinking? This was so wrong. Barry still had his complicated history with Iris. I'd just begun to live after accepting Ronnie was gone. Barry and our friendship, and us kissing was a guaranteed disaster. 

More panic pressed in. The logical part of me wanted to run somewhere, get away, process. But I knew Barry would misunderstand that, so I stayed. 

I decided I'd wait to hear what he had to say once his head was clear. 

No. Right. Cisco. Dr. Wells was on his way here. We need to be quick, I reminded myself.

"Right... the cameras," he muttered. I nodded, and we both stepped back toward the monitors.

I kept my eyes fixed on the feed, willing my brain to focus on Wells, on the footage, on anything but the taste of Barry's lips still lingering on mine.

I could feel him glancing at me, not constantly, but often enough that I didn't need to look to know. The air between us was still charged from what had happened. I wanted to tell him to stop looking, but the truth was... I didn't want him to.

My hands worked automatically, scrubbing through the timestamps, marking points for review. But every time his arm brushed mine, or his shoulder shifted just slightly toward me, my focus faltered. I replayed the kiss in my head, the warmth of his hands, the way his breath had caught, the soft, unsteady sound he'd made when I kissed him back.

"Barry," I said finally, without turning to him, "You're not even looking at the screen."

There was a pause, and then his voice came low, lower than I expected. "No. I'm not."

I risked a glance at him, and for a split second, the lab, the cameras, all of it disappeared. We were right back in that kiss, teetering on the edge of doing it all over again.

I turned back to the screen before I could do something reckless.

"Barry..." I said, finally going back to my senses.  

"Caitlin..." He whispered, not looking away from the screen. As if in response to what I was about to say next.. "I don't regret it."