A Silent Hope

Chapter Nineteen

"Psh, no. Gimme that." I snatched the mop back and continued. I felt his eyes on me, which I chose to ignore while keeping my face expressionless. "Go away. You have your own work to do."

"It is Thalia." He smirked, hands folded with a smug look. "Something happened."

"No, it didn't." I denied, avoiding eye contact. "Go away."

"You've been on cloud nine for days. Even when cleaning up after the storm. You're all...happy. You're always happy, but not this happy." He rubbed his chin in thought. "Something happened."

I looked around, wary of our surroundings even though no one else was here. "She kissed me. No, wait. I kissed her, but she asked me too. We kissed." I whispered.

Paul's face lit up. "That's great! That's what you wanted. Right? Wait, did you want her? Or just wanted to be friends. I'm confused."

I blinked, confused myself at the change in direction. I didn't approach Thalia with any ulterior motives, I only wanted one thing from her and I got it. But the thing was, now that I had a taste, saw her smile and heard her laugh, I wanted more.

"I, I don't know." I shrugged, panicking slightly. "What does she want? It was hard to even get her to get where we are, not that I'm complaining, I'd do it again. I just don't know if she'd want more or not. Is she even into women? Just because she let me kiss her, doesn't mean I should get all.....hopeful. I should keep calm and let things flow. Right? Say I'm right."

Paul eyed me with worry, slowly taking the mop I had pointed at him away from me. "Okay, calm down. Let's talk. So, you like her?"

I nodded dumbly, trying to figure out when that happened. "Uh huh."

"And you kissed."

"Her lips are so.....perfect."

"Nothing more than that?"

"I didn't need more."

"Oh, buddy." He pulled me into a tight hug. "You're okay."

I removed myself with some trouble because of his strength. "Of course, I'm okay. I'm great. I'm awesome."

"Are you gonna tell her?" Paul asked.

I physically jumped from the thought alone. "Are you crazy? No, I'm not gonna tell her. Why would I do that? She'll probably never see me again."

His eyes squinted as he took on a thoughtful look. "What if she feels the same way?"

I allowed, savoured, the idea for a moment, wondering what it would be like to have a woman like Thalia be with me. "She's more likely to hit me and never talk to me again. We're friends."

"Friends don't kiss." Paul pointed out.

I ignored him and went on with my work.

When I saw Thalia again, it was at the bar. I walked in to see her clearing empty bottles from the tables and wiping down the surface. The music was soft and the place almost empty. Hands in my pockets, I steadily moved towards her.

"It's almost closing time." I announced my presence.

She smirked without sparing me a glance. "It sure is."

I twirled my finger around one of my twists while I waited, following when she walked behind the counter. Thalia shot me a raised brow and indicated she'd be back. I sat with my hands clasped on the freshly wiped counter top and bent my head down.

Eyes shut, I willed my mind to stop running wild. I was a grown woman, an  adult, I could handle dealing with one kiss. Even if the kiss was one of the softest, loveliest, most tender kisses known to man. I could power through, I was mature and sensible. No need to get all flustered because she tasted like heaven on earth or because she felt so good when I held her.

Woman up, Mac.

"You okay, Kenz?"

I swiftly sat up and nodded enthusiastically. "Yup! All done?"

Thalia watched me, eyes floating over my face. "What's up?"

"Nothing. Everything's down." I blinked.

A frown covered her face then, something between a smile and a grimace on her lips. "What?"

"I don't know." I mumbled.

"I'm this close to being extremely worried about you, Kenzie." The brunette said while coming to stand beside me.

"What for? I'm chill." I stood and looked down at her. "You look nice."

Lips pressed together, Thalia hummed. "I look the same as I always do."

"You always look nice." I shrugged.

"Are you okay?" Her hand reached up to my forehead. "Your skin is a bit hot."

I grabbed the hand and held it. "Ready to leave?"

A hesitant nod. "Yeah."

Thalia waved to the manager and led us out, holding the door open for me with a smug smirk. I was about to lead us towards her place when she stopped us, tugging my hand in the other direction.

"Where are we going?" I asked, obediently letting her drag me wherever.

"I don't want to go home right now."

She only stopped when we reached the small hill I often visited. Sitting side by side, arms brushing, I stole subtle glances to the woman next to me.

Her side profile was just as beautiful as any other part of her. Short hair blocked most of her face as they fell forward with the slight dip of her head. Heart shaped lips were taunting, teeth grazing over the pink flesh. I swallowed, facing forward again to not stare.

But then, I stared some more. I watched her run her hand through the luscious texture on her head, ruffling them a bit. A knee came up to place an elbow on it, fist under chin. A small sigh, contentment, she was at ease. Just as all those mornings I'd see her under that oak tree, peaceful.

So, I leaned back on my elbows and crossed my ankles. I tried to find the same tranquility she did at that moment, and I did.

"Why here? In this town? Its empty. So why here?" Brown eyes peered down at me.

I threw my head back and breathed out loudly. "I don't know. I didn't have an answer for my parents or Paul when they asked. I still don't have an answer. I just did. It's the complete opposite of the city. I was kinda crazy over there and here, I don't have any reason to be."

"How crazy?" She asked quietly.

I sat up and criss-crossed my legs, jeans tighter against my skin. "I took too many chances. Almost lost my life a couple of times, and my job, but I didn't." I lifted my shirt under the leather jacket and took her hand. "Feel."

Thalia's fingers blindly traced the scar on my left rib cage. "What is that?"

"A piece of metal fell on me. Sliced through and through. Got lucky." I trembled as her touch remained on me.

"I never noticed it." She murmured.

"It blends in now." I chuckled.

The woman retracted her hand and sighed. "You came here for safety."

"I came here for peace." I fixed my clothes and shifted when I felt a pebble under me.

"Have you found it?"

"Getting there." I grunted and shifted again.

"What's wrong?" She asked when I kept doing it.

"Something is under my ass. Where is it?"

"Stop moving. Lift up."

I stopped moving and lifted my butt.

"Just a small rock." Thalia threw it away with a chuckle.

"Thanks." I grumbled and sat properly. "My ass hurts now."

"You'll get over it."

-E